How to start reading the Bible to your children.

This is a simplified list of Bible stories to read to your children each year. It is by no means complete, but a great resource to help you read to them and become familiar with Bible passages revolving around the majority of core topics the Bible covers.
Charlotte Mason advocated reading to the children in the King James Version because of its' poetic quality. For that reason, some Catholics may enjoy reading to their children in the Douay-Rheims Version, however in our home we prefer the Revised Standard Version, Catholic Edition.
It is also worth noting that you may want to consider passing over the parts of your reading that you consider too violent or challenging for children to accept or understand. I try not to skip parts but to use oversimplified, but true, explanations. Some children, however, might be sensitive to some of the subject matter in the Bible, and require special attention in that department.
In our house, we do lots of work with the Bible each day, from memory work to praying the liturgy of the hours three times a day to studying the daily mass readings. Because of that, I don't have a lot of time to just READ the Bible, but I noticed I needed to when one day my husband mentioned that they didn't know who Abraham was, even though they could tell you play by play what happens in the Mass and why. I couldn't believe I had failed at this epically important job, and set to work reading a short bible story/passage each day  at bedtime, just to reinforce the passages they were hearing at other times. I also use this time to get them to do narration: re-telling me the story in their own words as they heard it.
Use this list however your family wants! It has been tremendously helpful to me, and I'm sure will be to you also. Happy Bible reading!

STORIES FROM THE OLD TESTAMENT

In the Beginning--Genesis 1:1-31
Garden of Eden—Genesis 2:1-10; 15-25
The Serpent—Genesis 3:1-24
Cain and Abel—Genesis 4:1-16
Seth—Genesis 4:25-26; 5:1-8; opt: 5: 9-32
Noah—Genesis 6:5-22
Ark and Animals—Genesis 7:1-16
The Flood—Genesis 7:17-24; 8:1-5
The Raven and the Dove—Gen. 8:6-22
God’s Promise—Gen. 9:1-17
The Sons of Noah—Gen. 9:18-29
The Tower of Babel—Gen. 11:1-9
Abram—Gen. 12:1-9
Journey to Egypt—Gen. 12:10-20
Abram and Lot—Gen. 13:1-18
Lot is Captured in War—Gen. 14:11-16
Melchizedek—Gen. 14:17-24
Promise to Abram—Gen. 15:1-18
Sarai and Hagar—Gen. 16:1-16
Covenant—Gen. 17:1-14
New Names—Gen. 17:15-27
Three Holy Men—Gen. 18:1-15
(opt.) Sodom, Gomorrah—Gen. 18:16-33
Pillar of Salt—Gen. 19:1-7; 9-29
The Old Mother—Gen. 21:1-21
Abraham’s Test—Gen. 22:1-13
(opt.) The Death of Sarah—Gen. 23:1-20
The Servant’s Task—Gen. 24:1-9
Watering the Camels—Gen. 24:10-28
Rebecca’s Family—Gen. 24:29-51
Rebecca’s Journey—Gen. 24:52-67
(opt.) Death of Abraham—Gen. 25:1-11
Birthright for Pottage—Gen. 25:19-34
(opt.) Isaac—Gen. 26:1-6; 12-14; 23-25
The Stolen Blessing—Gen. 27:1-29
Esau—Gen. 27:30-46
(opt.) Jacob’s Ladder—Gen. 28:1-5; 10-22
Rachel at the Well—Gen. 29:1-14
The Other Sister—Gen. 29:15-35
More Wives—Gen. 30:1-13; 17-21
Rachel’s Baby—Gen. 30:22-32, 43
Jacob Departs—Gen. 31:1-7; 14-21
The Pursuit—Gen. 31:22-26; 30-35
The Brothers—Gen. 32:3, 6-7, 11; 33:1-12
An Altar—Gen. 35:1-7, 10-15
Deaths in the Family—Gen. 35:16-20; 23-29
Coat of Many Colors—Gen. 37:1-36
Joseph in Egypt—Gen. 39:1-9, 13-23
Interpreter of Dreams—Gen.-40:1-23
Pharaoh’s Dreams—Gen. 41:1-13
Joseph’s Interpretation—G. 41:14-16; 25-45
A Ruler in Egypt—Gen. 41:46-57
Famine—Gen. 42:1-20
Famine, cont.—Gen. 42:21-38
Brothers Return to Egypt—Gen. 43:1-14
Return, cont.—Gen. 43:15-34
The Silver Cup—Gen. 44:1-34
The Lost Brother—Gen. 45:1-28
Moving to Egypt—Gen. 46:1-7; 28-34
Land of Goshen—Gen. 47:1-13; 20-31
Joseph’s Sons—Gen. 48:1-6; 8-22
Farewell—Gen. 49:1-2, 28-33; 50:1-9,12-13
Joseph’s End—Gen. 50:14-26
No More Sons—Exo. 1:1-22
Baby Moses—Exo. 2:1-10
Moses Flees Egypt—Exo. 2:11-25
Burning Bush—Exo. 3:1-22
Moses and the Lord Speak—Exo. 4:1-17
Moses Leaves Midian—Exo. 4:18-23; 27-31
Let My People Go—Exo. 5:1-23
Jehovah—Exo. 6:1-13
River of Blood—Exo. 7:1-25
Frogs, Lice and Flies—Exo. 8:1-32
Dead Cattle and Boils—Exo. 9:1-21
Hail and Fire—Exo. 9:22-35
Locusts—Exo. 10:1-20
Darkness—Exo. 10:21-29
The First Passover—Exo. 12:3-15, 21-28
Leaving—Exo. 12:29-42, 50-51; 13:21-22
Parting the Red Sea—Exo. 14:5-31
Manna—Exo. 16:1-31, 35
(opt.) Jethro—Exo. 18:1-27
Ten Commandments—Exo. 20:1-17
Stone Tablets—Exo. 24:12-18; 31:18
A Golden Calf—Exo. 32:1-7; 15-20; 26-35
New Tablets—Exo. 34:1-6; 10; 27-35
The Journey—Numbers 10:11-13; 33-36
(opt.) Miriam’s Murmuring—Num. 12:1-16
Water from a Rock—Num. 20:1-18
(opt.) A Talking Donkey—Num. 22:1-38
Joshua—Num. 27:12-23
Love the Lord—Deuteronomy 6:1-7; 17-25
Good Courage—Deut. 31:1-3; 6-8;14-15; 23
Moses Dies—Deut. 34:1-12
Joshua Leads Israel—Joshua 1:1-9
Spies in Jericho—Joshua 2:1-24
Crossing Jordan—Jsh 3:7,14-17;4:4-11;14-18

Fall of Jericho—Joshua 6:12-27
Be Courageous—Joshua 23:1-11; 24:29
Gideon—Judges 6:1-3; 6-16; 22-31; 36-40
The Small Army—Judges 7:1-8; 13-22
Lord Shall Rule—Judges 8:22-23; 32-35
Samson is Born—Judges 13:1-7; 24
Samson and Delilah—Judges 16: 1-31
Ruth Comes to Bethlehem—Ruth 1: 1-22
The Gleaner—Ruth 2:1-23
Ruth and Boaz—Ruth 3:1-18
Ruth Marries—Ruth 4:1-17
Hannah’s Son—Samuel 1:1-2; 7-28
Samuel Serves—Samuel 2:18-21, 26.
Lord Calls Samuel—Samuel 3:1-14
Samuel’s Vision—Samuel 3:15-21
Make Us a King—Samuel 8:1-10; 18-22
Saul—Samuel 9:1-8; 10-14
The Seer—Samuel 9:15-19; 25-27
King Saul—Sam 10:1-2; 6-7; 9-17; 24-27;
11:15
Jonathan—Samuel 14:1; 6-20; 23
Honey—Samuel 14: 24-30; 36-39;43-45
Kingdom Torn—Sam. 15:10-11; 24-31; 34-35
Samuel Anoints David—Samuel 16:1-13
The Harp Player—Samuel 16:14-23
Goliath—Samuel 17:1-11
David—Samuel 17:12-31
David and Goliath—Samuel 17:32-58
Best Buds—Samuel 18:1-16
David’s Flight—Samuel 19:1-10
The Signal—Samuel 20:16-42
David’s Army—Samuel 22:1-2; 23:1-5
(opt) Saul Chases David—Samuel 23:13-29
Meeting in a Cave—Samuel 24:1-12; 16-22
The End of Saul—Samuel 31:1-13
King David—2 Samuel 2:1-4; 5:1-4; 9-12
Bathsheba—2 Samuel 11:1-17; 26-27
David’s Lesson and the Birth of Solomon—2
Samuel 12:1-24
Solomon Becomes King—Kings 1:1, 5,
10-18;20-37
David Dies—Kings 2:1-4;10-12
The Gift of Wisdom—Kings 3:1-15
The Judgment—Kings 3:16-28
Building the Temple—Kings 5:1-7; 17-18;
6:1-2; 11-14; 37-38
Ark and the Temple—Kings 8:1; 3-6; 9-13
The Queen of Sheba—Kings 10:1-10, 13
Solomon’s Downfall—Kings 11:4, 6, 9-13
Jeroboam—Kings 11:26-31, 34-40, 42-43
Elijah—Kings 17 (all)
The Challenge—Kings 18:1-9; 13-46
Still Small Voice—Kings 19
The Vineyard—Kings 21
Fire from Heaven—2 Kings 1
Elijah is Translated—2 Kings 2
A Pot of Oil—2 Kings 4:1-7
Seven Sneezes—2 Kings 4:8-37
Naaman, the Syrian—2 Kings 5
(opt.) Taken Captive—2 Kings 17:6-23
Hezekiah—2 Kings 18:1-8; 19:15-19; 32-36
Longer Life—2 Kings 20:1-7
Captivity is Prophesied—2 Kings 20:14-21
(opt.) Book of Law—2 Kings 22
Return to Righteousness—2 Kings 23:1-4; 14; 21-27
Nebuchadnezzar—2 Kings 24:10-20
Jerusalem Destroyed—2 Kings 25:8-21
(opt.) King Cyrus—Ezra 1
(opt.) Rejoicing—Ezra 3
Darius—Ezra 6:14-22
The Queen’s Refusal—Esther 1
A New Queen—Esther 2
The Decree—Esther 3
Brave Esther—Esther 4
The Gallows—Esther 5
Haman’s Shame—Esther 6
Haman’s Plot—Esther 7
Mordecai—Esther 8
Job—Job 1
Illness—Job 2:10
Job’s Blessings—Job 42:1-6; 10-17
The Lord is my Shepherd—Psalm 23
Make a Joyful Noise—Psalm 100
A Quiver Full—Psalm 127
Some Proverbs: 3:5-6; 3:13; 15:1;17:17; 18:24; 22:6; 23:7; 30:5
(opt.) A Virtuous Woman Proverbs 31:10-31
There is a Season—Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
(opt.) Messiah is Foretold—Isaiah 9:6-7
Daniel’s Food—Daniel 1:1-21
Nebuchadnezzar’s Dream—Daniel 2:1,
16-20,24-30, 46-49
Into a Furnace—Daniel 3:4-6,8-14, 16-30
Daniel in the Den of Lions—Daniel 6
Jonah and the Whale—Jonah Chapters 1-3
Tithing—Malachi 3:8-12




STORIES FROM THE NEW TESTAMENT

The Gospels (Compiled by Penny Gardner)

Zach & Elisabeth have a Baby--Luke 1:5-25
Angel Visits Mary--Luke 1:26-38
Angel Visits Joseph--Matt1:18-24
Mary and Elisabeth--Luke 1:39-56
Birth of John the Baptist--Luke 1:57-66
Birth of Jesus--Luke 2:1-12
Baby Jesus in the Temple--Luke 2:22-40
The Wise Men--Matthew 2:1-12
Journey to Egypt--Matthew 2:13-23
Boy Jesus Visits the Temple--Luke 2:41-52
John's Ministry--Matt. 3:1-17
Jesus is Tempted--Matt. 4:1-11
(opt.)John’s Men Follow Jesus--John 1:35-51
Marriage at Cana--John 2:1-12
The First Passover--John 2:13-25
Nicodemus--John 3:1-13 (or to 21)
The Ministry--John 3:22-36
John the Baptist Goes to Prison
Matt. 14:1-12
Woman at the Well--John 4:1-42
Jesus' Mission Continues
John 4:43-54
Capernaum--Luke 4:16-44
The Fishermen--Mark 1:16-20
The Calling of Peter--Luke 5:1-11
Leper is Healed--Luke 5:12-16
The Twelve--Luke 6:12-16; 9:1-11
Sermon on the Mount--Matt. 5:1-48
(opt.) Sermon on Mount, cont.--Matt. 6:1-34
(opt.) Prayer--Matt. 7:7-23
Building a House--Matt. 7:24-29
The Centurion's Servant--Luke 7:1-10
The Widow's Son--Luke 7:11-17
Healings--Mark 1:29-34
Peace be Still--Matt. 8:18-27
The Swine--Matt. 8:28-34
Miracles in Capernaum--Matt. 9:1-17
Daughter of Jarius--Matt. 9:18-26
More Miracles in Capernaum--Matt. 9:27-35
(opt.) The Second Passover--John 5:1-47
The Sabbath Day--Matt. 12:1-21
(opt.) Pharisees & a Sign--Matt. 12:38-50
Parable of the Sower--Luke 8:4-15
Parable of the Candle--Luke 8:16-18
Parable of the Tares--Matt. 13:24-30; 36-43
Parable of the Mustard Seed--Matt. 13:31-33
(opt.) Parable of the Treasure--Matt. 13:44-52
Carpenter’s Son--Matt. 13:53-58
Feeding the Five Thousand--Matt. 14:13-21
Walking on Water--Matt. 14:22-33
More Healings--Matt. 15:21-31
Feeding the Four Thousand--Matt. 15:32-39
(opt.) Pharisees--Matt. 16:1-12
Blind Man Sees--Mark 8:22-26
Peter's Testimony--Mark 8:27-38
Transfiguration--Mark 9:2-13
The Child with Evil Spirits--Mark 9:14-32
Greatest in the Kingdom--Mark 9:33-37
(opt.) Forgiving--Mark 9:38-50
Parable of the Lost Sheep--Matt. 18:12-14
(opt.) The Unmerciful Servant--Matt. 18:23-35
Feast of the Tabernacle--John 7:2-9
Samaria--Luke 9:51-56
(opt.) The Seventy--Luke 10:1-20
The Good Samaritan--Luke 10:25-37
Martha & Mary--Luke 10:38-42
Healing on the Sabbath--Luke 13:10-17
Parable of the Unjust Steward--Luke 16:1-8
Parable of the Rich Man--Luke 16:19-31
Ten Lepers--Luke 17:11-19
(opt.) The Adulterous Woman--John 8:1-11
(opt.) Blind Man Healed--John 9:1-41
Parable of the Good Shepherd--John 10:1-18
Little Children--Matt. 19:13-15
The Rich Young Ruler--Matt. 19:16-26
The Laborers in Vineyard--Matt. 20:1-16
Feast of Dedication--John 10:22-39
Lazarus--John 11:1-46
Two Blind Men--Matt. 20:30-34
Zacchaeus--Luke 19:1-10
Parable of Pounds—Luke 19:11-27
Moneychangers--Matt. 21:12-16
The Fig-Tree--Matt. 21:17-22
Authority Challenged--Mat 21:23-27
Parable of Two Sons--Matt 21:28-32
The Wicked Husbandmen--Matt. 21:33-46
Tribute to Caesar--Matt. 22:15-22
Great Commandment--Matt. 22:34-46
Widow's Mite--Mark 12:41-44
(Opt.) Signs of Second Coming--Matt. 24:1-51
Parable of Ten Virgins--Matt. 25:1-13
Parable of Talents--Matt. 25:14-30
Parable of Sheep & Goats--Matt. 25:31-46
Precious Ointment--Matt. 26:1-13
Eve of the Passover--Matt. 26:14-25
The Last Supper--Matt. 26:26-29
Washing the Disciples' Feet--John 13:2-17
(opt.) Comfort--John 14:1-31
Love One Another--John 15:1-17
Jesus Prays--John 17:1-4 (opt. 5-26)
Gethsemane--Matt. 26:30-46

Betrayal--Matt. 26:47-75
The Trial--Luke 22:63-71; 23:1-25
The Crucifixion--Matt. 27:27-50
The Burial--Matt. 27:54-66
Resurrection--Matt 28:1-15
Jesus Appears to Disciples--Luke 24:22-49
Doubting Thomas--John 20:24-31
Peter--John 21:1-25
Disciples Carry the Word--Mark 16:14-20

Acts - 2 Corinthians (Compiled by Tessa Hauglid)

Jesus’ Ascension into Heaven--Acts 1:1-11
A New Apostle--Acts 1:21-26
Day of Pentecost--Acts 2:1-8, 12-21
Peter Testifies of Christ
Acts 2:22-24, 38-47
Peter Heals Lame Man--Acts 3:1-9
Living the Law of Consecration--Acts 4:31-35
Lie and Die (optional) Acts 5:1-11
Arrested & Delivered--Acts 5:12, 16-32, 41-42
Transfiguration of Stephen--Acts 6:8-10, 12-15
Martyrdom: Stephen--Acts 7:51-60
Buying Priesthood Power (opt.) Acts 8:13-24
Philip and the Ethiopian Eunuch--Acts 8:26-35
Ethiopian Eunuch is Baptized--Acts 8:36-39
Jesus Appears to Saul--Acts 9:1-9
Ananias Restores Saul's Sight--Acts 9:10-18
Aeneas and Dorcas--Acts 9:32-42
Angel Appears to Cornelius--Acts 10:1-8
Gospel to the Gentiles--Acts 10:9, 11-23
Peter Meets Cornelius--Acts 10:24-33
Peter Teaches Cornelius--Acts 10:34-48
Believers Are Called Christians--Acts 11:19-26
Martyrdom of James and Freeing of Peter from Prison--Acts 12:1-11
Paul in Macedonia and Lydia--Acts 16:9-15
Paul and Silass Jailer Converts--Acts 16:16-34
Paul Preaches at Mars Hill--Acts 17:16-33
Paul Teaches Gentiles--Act 18:1-11
Holy Ghost Given--Acts 18:24-28; 19:1-6
Sleeping in Church Deadly--Acts 20-7-12
Paul Leaves the Ephesians--Acts 20:17-38
Paul Arrested--Acts 21:8-14, 26-36
Paul’s Conversion(opt.) Acts 21:37-40; 22:1-21
Paul Declares Roman Citizenry--Acts 22:22-30
Paul Sees the Lord in Vision--Acts 23:1-11
Forty Men Plot to Kill Paul--Acts 23:12-35
Paul Defends Self--Acts 24:10-27
Appeal to Caesar--Acts 25:1-4, 6-12, 22-27
Paul Testifies to King Agrippa--Acts 26:1-23
Agrippa Almost Converted--Acts 26:24-32
Paul's Perilous Journey--Acts 27:1-2, 9-11, 18-26, 40-44
Paul--Acts 28:1-11, 16, 23-24, 30-31
Paul's Letter--Romans 1:1, 7-12, 16-18, 29-32
God Renders to Every Man--Rom. 2:1-2, 6-11
Abraham's Faith--Romans 4:1-3, 13, 18-25
Justification thru Blood of Christ--Rom. 5:1-11
Baptism Like Death and Resurrection of Christ--Romans 6:3-11, 22-23
Life and Peace--Romans 8:1-6
Sons of God Have Hope--Romans 8:14-17, 24-28, 35-39
The End of the Law--Romans 10:1-6, 8-13, 17
Live as Saints--Romans 12:1-21
Love Fulfills Law--Romans 13:8-12
Avoid Judging One Another--Romans 14:1-19
Paul's Letter to Corinthians--1 Cor. 1:1-4, 10, 17-19, 23-24, 27, 30-31
The Spirit Reveals All Things--1 Cor. 2:1-16
Ye Are the Temple of God--1 Cor. 3:10-21, 23
The Lords Supper--1 Cor. 11:20
Gifts of the Spirit--1 Cor. 12:1, 3-12
Church Members--1 Cor. 12:13-31
Charity Never Faileth--1 Cor. 13:1-13
Paul's Testimony of Christ and Baptism for
Dead--1 Cor. 15:3-24, 29
Degrees of Glory and Resurrection--1 Cor. 15:40-41, 51-58
Paul's Second Letter to the Corinthians--2 Cor. 1:1-5, 21-24
Gospel Surpasses Law of Moses--2 Cor. 3:2-6, 12-18
We Walk by Faith--2 Cor. 5:7-10, 17
Believers Not Yoked (opt.) 2 Cor 6:14-18
God Loveth Cheerful Giver--2 Cor. 8:9; 9:6-11
Paul Glories in His Infirmities for Christ--2 Cor. 11:23-28; 12:5-10; 13:11-14

Additional Readings

Fruit of the Spirit--Gal. 5:22-26
Sowing and Reaping--Gal. 6:6-10
By Grace Through Faith--Eph. 2:1-10
Our Chief Cornerstone--Eph. 2:19-22
The Armor of God--Eph.6:10-20
The Coming of the Lord--1 Thess. 4:13-5:11
The Last Days--2 Tim. 3:1-9
God is Love--1 John 4:7-21
A Voice as a Trumpet--Rev.1:9-19
The New Jerusalem--Rev.21:1-7
The River of Life--Rev.22:1-5


Thanks to Penny Gardner, a Charlotte Mason method home educator, for putting this list together. You can check out her website to learn more about having her come to your area to teach a Charlotte Mason seminar.

Mama Mondays- Pacing your homeschoolers

I've been praying about how to pace my children so that they both learn from and enjoy school.
I want to push them, but I am a firm believer that you need to also give them space to grow. I see every morning how my children need both a hefty push to get past the "hard stuff" and move into victory in every department, and see those in between the poor effects of my pushing at the wrong moments or of me imposing my will on them when I'm not doing so out of charity for their upbringing but for selfish reasons, etc.
It is a very hard thing to balance, but balance we must, lest we do all the right things but lose their hearts in the process.
Charlotte Mason's wisdom in this department has been so beneficial for me, as I can see how implementing her ideas with regards to small children have been so helpful. While she was NEVER a softie who believed in kids running the world, she was still wise enough to know that there were benefits in MODERATION and in allowing Children the freedom to BE children at times. I take from her that I should both strive for order and structure and allow for unstructured play in which they can feel out their roles and responsiblities, and I think this is a healthy attitude.

"The busy mother says she has no leisure... and the child will run wild and get into bad habits; but we must not make a fetish of habit; education is a life as well as a discipline. Health, strength, and agility, bright eyes, and alert movements, come of a free life, out-of-doors, if it may be, and as for habits, there is no habit or power so useful to man or woman as that of personal initiative. The resourcefulness which will enable a family of children to invent their own games and occupations through the lenght of a summer's day is worht more in after life than a good deal of knowledge about cubes adn hexagons, and this comes, not of continual intervetnion on the mother's part, but of much masterly inactivity."

She also said something that I really appreciate, which is that we don't need to be setting up specific times for socializing between our younger kids and children their age. Wise words indeed, as experience has shown me. I've found that setting up playdates etc just causes problems later, whereas a natural mixture of people of all ages is WAY more efficient in teaching kids how to interact with others.

'...the mixed society of elders, jrs., and equals, which we get in a family..." gives the right mix of rest and individual development. Be careful not to supplement nature so much that we supplant her and 'deprive her of the space and time to do her own work..."

She also said that a mother's chief responsibility for the first six years is to secure for her children "Quiet growing time--and free growing time--the freedom of real play (not lessons that look like play) and of ordering one's own life. Habit training, lots of time observing things out of doors, and short, realistic lessons in the things of life (I take from that that five minutes in a REAL kitchen with mom is superior to thirty minutes baking a plastic casserole in a plastic oven just their size.)
All of these ideas have helped me so much to find the right balance between the academic requirements of the CLAA and the tendency kids have to just NOT like working. By implementing the CLAA's Benedictine motto of "Ora et Labora" (work and pray) and setting up a strict, no- fooling around schedule that really puts work and prayer before play and leisure, I find that our "free" time becomes more meaningful and rewarding... even mine!
At the same time, Keeping a firm eye on Charlotte Mason's idea to respect the human dignity of each child and pay attention to their PERSONhood (which she probably got from her profound devotion to God's Word, btw... Catholics have taught that since the beginning) has really helped me to be less anxious about whether or not I was pushing too hard or not enough at certain times.
In scheduling my PreK and K together I realized last month that I wasn't doing that enough... so this weekend I spent a good deal of time re-doing the schedule to make sure they each had "alone time" studying one on one with me without the distractions of the other children about. They didn't make tremendous improvements and start pushing through their lessons right away, but the quality of their work and the demonstration of their understanding of it has been far superior.
 And like St Josemaria, who said not to force children to say the rosary but rather to persist in saying it faithfully and requiring them to play QUIETLY beside you while you pray until they participate, I think this is the type of thing that really helps a child-- giving them enough freedom to work up their heartfelt INTEREST in what you are doing, vs. imposing your will upon them without regard for their interests/ideas.
I believe I once read that William Michael did something similar with his kids--he schedules a lengthy block of time for each subject and then if a child is having a hard time working he says: "go outside, come back when you are ready to work." They do. A father I admire very much tells his children the same thing during family worship. "Come back when you are ready to worship God." They do.
Another idea she advocates is waiting until fourth grade to begin official grammar lessons. Classical students will start earlier, of course, but I can see what wisdom there is in giving kids the chance to BE kids, too. My five year old girl is FAR more ready to work than my almost-four year old boy. She does this on her own-- if I allow her free time she will take out a coloring book and meticulously paste stickers and write letters around it. I have as of yet never seen my son do anything like that of his own accord, which says to me that he is not ready to do a lot of "official" anything.
Whereas she may be ready to start Grammar by the time she is eight or so, my son may not be ready til he is nine. The delicate balance between pushing him and allowing him wiggle room is a lot easier with the Charlotte Mason ideas we implement, such as giving him unstructured playtime out of doors for short spurts, stopping his lessons while he is still "interested," and before he shows signs of being bored, and things like that.
I honestly don't know how William Michael would feel about our inclusion of some fundamental CM ideas in our curriculum. I have a hard time imagining a young Plato walking around outside sketching trees. And yet....
I see in our homeschool how needed and beneficial these breaks in the day are.... how invigorated and ready to work my kids come back from them, and how much learning goes on. No, they aren't learning ""wisdom" when they sketch a squirrel... but they are seeing first hand God's creation, and that with delight! I am certain that this in turn produces a wonder and awe at God's creation that both humbles and excites.... motivating them to know the One who made all these wonderful things.
This past month has been amazing, and the children have been learning and growing so much. I also love that it's not just in observable "academic" areas but that their progress has been really amazing in other areas-- like in habit training, and in their attention spans, and love for one another.
It takes a REALLY long time to implement a new habit and to get it going. If this progress is only going to continue, then I am really excited.... I am so thankful for the help God has given our family along the way in developing a vision, an identity, and a plan. I look forward to seeing more and more fruit!
How is everyone's first steps back to school going??

Saints on Saturdays-Saint Teresa of Avila

"Nor is it in any way good for a person to complain if he sees his Order in some decline; rather he should strive to be the kind of rock on which the edifice may again be raised."

--St Teresa of Avila, OCD. 
Book of the Foundations.

Now replace the word "Order" in the above quotation with any of the following words, and you will see the great wisdom of this wonderful Carmelite Saint.

Marriage
Family
Workplace
Parish
School
Association
St Teresa of Jesus, pray for us.

Freaky Fridays- the 9.11/ Abortion/Hollywood Connection.

I'm not a "the government did it" 9/11 conspiracy theorist. I DO think there is far more to the story of what happened on that fateful September day, but I'm not sure that I will ever fully understand it and I'm only half trying.

I think to some degree, 9/11 was a mystical event in that it ushered in a new age in the world....  drawing us closer to a global, one -world government and simultaneously drawing pride and fear and woundedness from Americans, none of whom -- or few of whom-- seem to have picked up on the fact that for the first time ever, Americans were being FORCED into a situation where they were literally mourning and covered in ashes. Thousands of us. On a spiritual plane, that has to mean something.

The other day a Facebook friend posted this video, regarding the uncanny "foreknowledge" many Hollywood films exhibited about 9/11. We've all seen the bizarre Simpsons episode. This was a compilation of many of those same head scratchers, from lots of different movies. The purpose of this video was to enlighten people about the questions surrounding 9.11 and also about the Illuminati. (To be clear, neither of which I know anything about or believe anything in particular about... I just note that it s a popular belief system.)

You see, most people want a scapegoat. I was as disturbed by the terror attacks as I was by the response of Americans here in my military hometown dancing in the street at the news of Bin Ladin's death. I was as upset by our government's response (tightening security and acting like a psycho ex-boyfriend) as I was by Imams who were preaching the "good news" of the terror attacks. For a while, it was nice to be able to place blame.... Terrorism is because of Islam. Celebrity culture is because of drugs and alcohol. Government corruption is because of money. Right?

9/11 was a wake up call, that I know, and unfortunately, I do NOT believe the world is better for what changes we have implemented. I believe that there is less security, less safety, less dignity, less freedom and  life.... and that it is getting worse by the minute.

 I don't blame my government, although I'm sure that some people in my government had something to do with it. I don't blame Al Qaeda, although I'm sure that some people in Al Qaeda had something to do with it. I don't blame aliens, or hollywood, or anything, or anyone, really. Just Satan, who the Bible calls the god of this world, and who has clearly been using some unsavory characters to plan, plot, and propogate violence and fear and confusion, etc. We need to be good and frustrated as a global community for Antichrist to come on the scene (and no, he's not Obama.)

In the same vein, I noticed lately that some of our most vocal and adamant Pro-Life priests are being taken out, one by one. First Fr Tom Euteneuer, then Fr Corapi, and now Fr. Pavone.  Many Catholics felt disheartened or let down by the realization that their leaders had failed them. Call me weird, but I was motivated..... hello??!! This is IT. THIS is the warfare of the saints. There isn't one pope, or one Bishop, not ten priests or twenty laypeople that you can BLAME for what's wrong in the Church. Our job isn't to be overwhelmed by the evident evil and accuse persons and pit ourselves in rage against them.... our job is to pray, and wage warfare, and declare the advance of the Kingdom of Heaven over the kingdom of darkness.

Whatever the subject...   9/11, illuminati/freemasonry, the issues in the Church, the issues in hollywood, celebrity alter egos, rock and roll, new age, globalism, greedy corporations, "un"natural natural disasters, weather control, religious wars,  out of control governments, pornography, countries who kill their young.... it's all there, it's all connected, like giant pieces to the puzzle of our lives. Why be let down when Satan manifests his works? Be grateful, and be somber-- for the Gospel of Life and Salvation is true and Jesus Christ is coming again. Quite frankly, it gives me a lot of peace and de-mystifies the whole blame-game for me each and every time a new "outrageous" thing happens that sets the American emotion machine into action.

So with that in mind, enjoy this little documentary I found on demonic posession. Because if the people who manifest evil around this world are indeed as evil as they appear.... it certainly isn't coming from no where. Blame the right person. Blame the devil, and remember that your battle is not against flesh and blood but against the wickedness in the spiritual realm.

Theology Thursdays- married and buried

"Because I realize that no one will ever love me like God loves me."
Those words, spoken by a young lady I know and love when asked why she was considering a vocation to religious life, and relayed to me by her amazed and grateful mother across a plate of Colombian-made quesadillas,  forever solidified in my mind the decision to trust God that my marriage was the best thing He had planned for me.

You see, my marriage hasn't been easy. And while I'm not going to reveal all the ways and reasons why that is, suffice to say that I have known a deep suffering, sometimes even regret, over my choice to marry. At the same time, I have known an inner joy that was more than just happiness or contentment... I've experienced true, real, and lasting peace in my marriage, and that's something I don't think many people can say.
The most important thing I've learned from all this married life can be summed up in one sentence:
Marriage isn't really about me. It's a gift to the world, because no one will ever love me, like God loves me.

When I was younger, I had many boyfriends. Girlfriends, too. Relationships came and went like the tide on the beach where I lived, and the only real reason--if I'm honest-- that I pursued them as much and as hard as I did was that I was lonely. I wanted someone to love me unconditionally, to think I was interesting, pretty, funny, or smart.
Because I was raped and abused as a child I also got an inordinate amount of my sense of identity from my sexuality, which meant that in those confusing days, I simultaneously wanted to be sexy, desirable, and objectified, and left alone, respected--even cherished.
But that wasn't what happened. It never is.

Intentionally or not, I exuded the promises of sex and sensuality, so people wanted to have sex with me, and it was never long in my peer groups and around town before I was known as a slut, even though I didn't have sex anywhere NEAR as much as people assumed that I did.

It probably didn't help that I was raised between America and France, and as such had learned a certain art of seduction that American girls are sometimes poorly educated in-- the ability to make promises with my eyes, for example, or to know just how to make one's desires... and purposes... known without saying a word. Americans often romanticize the French ability to seduce, but truth be told the French use it not so much for sexual purposes as Americans would like to think. Rather, it's a part of the general French concept that one should make even the most mundane experiences as pleasurable as possible. Whatever the reason, I incited thoughts about sex and sexuality far more than I ever should have or WOULD have had  I actually had the foresight to know what I was doing.

The awkward situations multiplied before my eyes-- the man who kept hanging around our sliding glass door and watching my roommates and I sleep, the man who groped me as I passed him on a freeway overpass on my way home from the bars, the woman who molested me in the blacklight room in the back of a head shop, the man who followed me home from a rave, the man who groped me on the metro... these were just a few of the people who caused me pain in those years by having absolutely no concern for my human dignity.
Then there are the people I objectified...the man who I seduced, slept with, and then hurt by not wanting to be in a relationship with the next day when he was excited about it. The women in the pornography industry whom I worked with. The man who loved me and whose love and care I mocked by cheating.

Then I got married, and those relationships and situations became like a distant fog that I was sure would never wrap its way around me.Eventually, they did, of course. Every single one has had an impact on my marriage in some way. But at the time, I was sure.... I was safe. It was my time.

When I got married, I wasn't thinking about objectification, sanctification, or anything else. I was thinking about me: dreams of always having someone to rub noses with when the first rays of the sun hit the blinds... of shared meals and holidays, of soft kisses and bottles of red wine emptied over discussions about dreams and The Future.

Dreams gave way to reality, and it became increasingly difficult for me to understand why people got married in the first place. It wasn't that I didn't "love" my husband....I did, and most of my problems stemmed from the fact that I couldn't understand how someone who loved me could be so inconsiderate and unkind. (Of course, at the time, I was both things to him as well.)

 I knew all of the solutions people had for building up a bad marriage-- working on trust, and communication, and compassion. And I just wasn't seeing it in my own marriage... the only thing I saw was injustice, and it was too much to go on.

Around that time I found a book called "Created to be his helpmeet" by Debi Pearl. In it, I read a different message than the one I heard everywhere else.... a message that in my blind selfishness I had never before considered. That message? That it didn't really MATTER if I had been given a good or a bad husband. What mattered was that I was responsible for my own actions, my own responses, my own soul, my own situation. And for every action I took.

As a protestant, this message resonated with me very strongly. It stuck with me as a Catholic, and was especially interesting to ponder when I considered the lives of the married saints, many of whom had had extremely difficult marriages to husbands far, FAR worse than my own. Over time I made this message the central point of my life, and it helped me to heal so many other wounded relationships because the relational points were the same:
Two wrongs don't make a right. It doesn't matter if he's wrong if you aren't right. We love others because God first loved us. And no one will ever love me like he does.

It's not an easy message. It's even harder to hear through the din of voices that clamor: "you have that right!" and "don't you deserve to be happy?" and "I could never do that. I don't know how you do!"

I've thought about it often. I've seen first-hand how arranged marriages can turn into completely amazing, fulfilling love-fests complete with fruitful, large families and joy, joy, joy. I've also seen how families who have everything going for them "physically" (good health, good looks, good finances, good experiences) can have nothing going for them spiritually... just emptiness and sadness, behind the pretty, shiny surface.

What makes it work? What makes one marriage stick and another dissolve?

Over time, I've often wondered if it "would have worked out" with someone else... in another situation, with another person, one of the people I mentioned before, for example.
I've asked myself... if we only had more money, if we had different jobs, if we had less kids, or more. If we lived in a different city, or if we were different people. Every time, I come to the same conclusion--that there would still be issues, imperfections, moments that don't work. There would still be stuff that got in the way between me and my happiness. And if I was single? The same struggles, the same distress. There is truly no right answer, only the path that God has laid before each individual person, with struggles tailor-made to fit that person.

I came to realize that marriage was a saint factory. That for every person who had ever sinned against me and for every person who I had ever sinned against, there was healing to be found in the messy, sweet, stretching-towards-perfect union of two people who commit to daily walking towards a common goal and common life, regardless of where their heart might be at any given moment and regardless of what treasures or nightmares they are storing up in their souls at any given time.

My marriage would never be perfect... it would never even be "good," until I realized that it isn't my husband who loved me first, it was God.

My marriage needed something, but it wasn't family dinners and better communication, retreats or counsel from older couples. What it needed was sacrifice-- a spirit of salvific suffering, united to Christ. What it needed was the rooting out of those fleshly tendencies that keep us all enslaved to feelings, facts, and falls. What it needed was FAITH.

When I was in France this past summer, I came under a really powerful, really direct spiritual attack that nearly took me out. In essence, it was as if Satan was showing me all the kingdoms of the world and saying to me: you can have all this--- all these pleasures, all this fun, all this STUFF in the world... if you but bow down and worship me. My Lord and Savior, when he was in the same situation said:
"Get away, Satan! It is written: 'The Lord, your God, shall you worship and him alone shall you serve.'" (referencing Deuteronomy 10:20)

Me? I said YES...yes to the Liar and Enemy of my soul.....  yes to the enemy I have fought all my life.... Yes and more yes....yes until I came home and saw my husband-- who by the time I came home had become in my mind the cause of all my suffering and the reason behind my misery. 

I returned ready to pack up, move out, take my kids, enroll them in school, get on birth control, and get the Barbie show on the road. I was ready to throw in the towel and become a statistic... and all I could think of was FREEDOM! I wanted out.

It wasn't the first time we had considered divorce--- my husband and I are notorious in our circle because our priests are constantly blessing new wedding rings for us after we fling the old ones at each other and lose them. It's been a rocky road. On the other hand, I was ready to trash every inch of progress we had fought and prayed for for seven long years. Yes, it was true that we had come to love each other very much, despite our differences. But none of that mattered anymore....

After all... "I have that right!" and "don't I deserve to be happy?" and "You could never do that. You don't know how I put up with it!"

But do you know what happened?

One morning, I got a letter from my wonderful aunt, a secular humanist who runs a nonprofit and dedicates her entire life to helping women leave situations of slavery. While I love and admire and appreciate her dearly, it is worth noting that she is in no way what I would consider a practicing Christian. 

Her letter began: "My dear, I woke up this morning and felt I should write to you about freedom. It is an issue I have thought about for many long years. And what I have realized is this: My freedom ends where another's begins..."

I don't know why it hit me as hard as it did. I knew that God was talking to me, and I determined to listen. For the next several days, it seemed that was all he did. And when He was done, He made me a proposal.

Listen my daughter, He said to me. No one -- no one-- has freedom for the sake of freedom. You have freedom so that you can use it to do good. And what good will you do when you have refused to love and serve the very one whom you have promised Me to help? What good will it do when I ask you: Did you keep your promises? Did you love others, even the most difficult to love? Did you serve those I placed in your path? Were you an instrument of my Peace and a sower of my Word? I gave you freedom so that others might taste the freedom you have in me. Find it in ME. You can not give away what you do not have yourself.

Broken, I went to my husband and told him everything. And -- amazing as he is-- he took on the challenge, pain I caused him and all. This was all over a month ago, and it's still fresh in my mind. The results were immediate; already there is something healing about someone who should be running OUT running in with a determined grin. We are wowed with the courage of firefighters when they do that. Amazingly enough, my husband is now a firefighter, a daily reminder that death is right around the corner for all of us and that the bravest among us run IN to take care of others when everyone else is going out.

You see, we are called to die for others, in imitation of the One who died for us. Only if that grain of wheat DIES and falls to the ground, can it bring forth bread that nourishes.
When I was younger, I tried to kill myself while intending to live. Now that I'm older and wiser... I am intentionally living a life that aims to die.

And here I sit, writing you a blog when I should be sleeping, just so you know that I'm holding fast to those wedding vows. Why? "Because I realize that no one will ever love me like God loves me."

It may be what that young lady's vocation to religious life is all about..... but amazingly enough, it's also what my marriage is all about. And yours.

Not exactly wordless wednesday-Questions that need answering about our homeschool.

Since I've been in the throes of back to schoolishness, I have been blogging about homeschooling a lot. Which means that lots of other homeschooling familes have been reading my blogs, and checking out the CLAA where we homeschool. Which then leads them to the two MILLION questions that I asked myself before signing up.
One of the hardest things for our family was understanding the vast amounts of information on the website.... we literally spent hours reading and still felt like we had no idea what it would look like in practical theory. We were also worried about the primary means of information being the computer, since we did NOT want our kids in front of a computer all day! Well, eventually, we decided to try it anyways based on the rave reviews families were giving us who had tried it or been using it, and in the last month, as I've said, we have LOVED it and it has truly lived up to its' promises.

I'm now getting lots of questions about it, so I thought it would be helpful to do a "how we do it" blog.
PLEASE keep in mind this very important disclaimer. We are a BRAND NEW CLAA family with very young children... our kids are in Petty School, and not Academy students. So everything we do pertains to Petty School and might change later on. From what I understand, though, the system is the same in Petty School and in Academy, with Academy being, obviously, far more challenging and far-reaching. Because the system is the same, and everything builds on itself, no matter what age your children are they can all work together and go at their own pace. This makes the program very easy for large families and one thing I find wonderful! We live in the suburbs, and this is how we live right now. Some CLAA families live on farms, some on urban farms, some in cities. Some work, some don't. There is no cookie cutter mold, and this is the way OUR Family has implemented it. However, I could comfortably say that if our situation changed tomorrow, I would keep using CLAA.... it is possible no matter what the scenario. Also, remember that in NO WAY do we represent the CLAA or the Michael Family. 


So, without further ado, here is a photo tutorial about homeschooling with CLAA and how it works.

PART ONE: MOM'S PART
QUESTION ONE: What do you need to begin schooling with CLAA? Is it really as "liberating" as people say it is?
ANSWER: we needed a computer and a printer, a rosary for each person seven and older (we got one for each person, period, and use the unbreakable cord ones for the littles) alongside the following items: 
TWO three-ring binders, one for school and one for home management.
ONE folder for each child who is schooling.
ONE copy of the Liturgy of the Hours/Christian prayer one volume edition per person over seven in the house.
I find that I need a Bible and use it every day with them. That's really all you need. Pretty amazing, huh?

I have to say, this was one of the most refreshing changes for me, who was considering getting floor-to-ceiling, wall-to-wall shelving just to accomodate the insane amounts of expensive curriculum materials I was having to buy, borrow, use, and even STORE (because if I can find one I will be using ten years from now for a decent price now, you bet I'm gonna get it!) My first official act as a CLAA mommy was to GET RID of all the extra books and curriculum materials. And the purge continues, I'll be finding stuff for the next year, I'm sure! Good riddance.... thanks for the extra space, CLAA.

QUESTION TWO: So what do you keep in your binders/folders? What is the system and how does it work?

ANSWER: The children are required to do two things in each class-- memorize the lesson and do any writing exercises. On my end, it is very helpful to remain organized and set goals for them each week so that we stay on task. Here is my system: 

In the folders, I keep their written assignments which I have printed out and they are working on on the left alongside some sheets of blank paper to practice on. The upcoming assignments I have printed go on the left. I staple the sheets together into packets for each lesson to complete. Once they have finished, it goes out of the left side and into my binder, where dividers seperate the work by child. Then the child can take the new assignment from the right and get to work.

Inside the SCHOOL Binder, page one is the Schedule. That way I can check the time and check it to make sure we stay where we are supposed to be.

Page TWO is tips for our family culture, to remind me to stay on target with our goals, and also a printout of the week's lessons in every subject so I can drill them and work with them without getting on the computer. We can go outside, go in their rooms, I can drill them while I cook.

Page THREE is their goal sheet for the day and week. It helps me to make sure they are completing the work and not getting behind.

Behind that goes their actual written work, separated by dividers bearing each child's name (in this case, number).

Second binder contains my home management system (think, my organizer)

This has a copy of the schedule in it too, and then a printout of how the system works that William Michael wrote. You can download the system from him but it's tailored to CLAA and I don't know how helpful it would be for others. For me, it's perfect-- like using a really good Franklin Covey planner tailored to my lifestyle. It contains all of those elements plus some handy goal sheets that help you keep track of how your students are learning and what lessons they are doing next.

In the middle is the system itself (calendar, task lists, etc) and in the back is an envelope to hold mail that needs filing, pens, a thermometer , checkbook, etc. (hi Josemaria!)  and yes, I keep my NFP Charts in there too (these are from my vacation last month away from my husband, no laughing. :D)

I also have our clan motto, mission statement, and rules:

and..... a basic chore list organized by day of the week that I've used in the past. I am in the process of revising it so that it works better now that we have more chores and responsibilities around here, and more little helpers to do it all. This one, honestly, is kind of hilarious to me now because it is so outdated, and yet I remember how not very long ago I found it so challenging to keep up with just these menial tasks! There is LIGHT at the end of the tunnel, that's for sure.

OK, so now, the BIG question. The Kids' part! What does it look like? I apologize if I have to re-use some pictures that I've recently used but I don't have the time to take new ones and I think they will accurately illustrate the point.

STEP ONE: The kids are engaged in a daily culture of prayer and hard work.

STEP TWO: The kids complete rigorous academic exercises, memorize their work, and complete written assignments. They start by watching the lesson once on video (maybe a few times if it's tough) for about ten minutes. They can all do it together, or work at their own pace, and even the littles can participate. And even I learn something new. :)

After they have seen the video, I sit down with them and work on making sure they learn it. They do this together or one at a time, as needed. In the picture below, I'm working with my oldest while my middle does laundry and my youngest plays quietly on the floor. We're using a magnetic doodle pad to work, but you don't really even need that.

Lastly, you go about your normal business (here, the kids are doing a nature study outside. While we walk, I drill them on their lessons so we just keep at it all day, no matter what we are doing.)

Then, they sit down to do their written work. Once they are all done, I quiz them, and if I think they are ready, they take the test for that lesson. If they pass, they move on. If they fail, they stick with the same lesson as long as it takes to get it. It's that easy!

More than a few people have asked me about the discipline and prayer life at home... what that means, what it entails. I would say that there are a few guidelines which are "recommended" by Mr. Michael. They are involve specific devotions/prayers/ways of living your faith.  People have asked me if the Michaels check up on your family culture. I kind of laugh, because I wondered that too, but now it seems silly. They are adamant because they want you to do it since it will help your homeschool. But they have no idea what goes on in your home (hello? They are a CURRICULUM PROVIDER, not a cult, even though they have a cult following. :D)  and so we do it a little differently.
They recommend praying the liturgy of the hours, and base alot of later religion coursework on it. My kids are WAY too young to follow along, but I do it anyways, because it's good for them. They recommend doing so in the Family Chapel, which they recommend placing in the "spare room" instead of a playroom or office. We have a family altar and that is where we say our morning prayers, and we say our evening prayers in bed. Not because we don't want a family chapel, but because we don't have one, and right now, we can't have one.

During the day, we use the family altar, but I don't pray daytime prayer from liturgy of the hours. Instead, I will praise and worship with the kids, or read to them from the readings of the day.
He recommends going to mass. But he does NOT recommend going to daily mass unless you CAN. And I love that, because.... we can't! :) Nevertheless if things change and we suddenly live next door to a Parish or something, we will.
He recommends frequent reception of the sacraments. We go to confession as a family every Saturday, and Mass as often as possible.
He has a list of daily CLAA prayers, they are the basic prayers every Catholic says. We sometimes start and end our day with them, or sometimes start our day with St Patrick's Breastplate and in the evening, the "Evening prayer for the family" and Litany for the Church.
We pray the rosary together every day. Sometimes twice a day!
That's about it as far as devotional PRACTICES go, but then are the choices-- what to wear, watch, say etc. I'm always trying to build up a culture of eternal life in the house, whatever that means to you. To me, it means teaching them about the Lord when they lie down, and when they rise up, and when they walk on the way.... etc.
As far as discipline goes, in our house anyways, we just don't encourage foolishness. We want smart, holy , serious kids and we provide them with the means to achieve that through correction and training and teaching and example, but at the same time, we are a very loving, very happy, very fun family. We are always laughing and always being sweet to one another. Well, not always, but you know what I mean! I try to build up my husband, and he tries to build me up and encourage me. We know our kids imitate us, so we are as kind as we can be to them, and they respond by being loving and kind. And we love adventures. So when I say that we are working towards being "disciplined" I mean that we set boundaries and are firm with them, we try to train away selfishness and foolishness and pride and lust and gluttony and envy and deceit and things like that. We hate laziness. That kind of thing. Our motto around here is to be good, and do good. And our Clan Motto has historically been: "I will endure." I think THAT about sums up the discipline side of it.  There is no lack of hugs and kisses, laughter and fun.... but our focus and goal is to get to heaven and bring everyone we know with us, so we don't waste time because we know it's precious, and there is work to do.
I HOPE this has been helpful to anyone seeking out more information about the practical application of the CLAA curriculum, and I would love to hear your comments and questions. Blessings!

Teaching kids to pray

Two weeks ago we began my oldest children's "official" catechism lessons. Until that point, we just tried to teach them the faith via sensory activities and moral teachings, but now we are teaching them the actual Catechism, bit by bit, via the CLAA's Catechism I course (this is for my five and four year old.)
Two things occurred to me when we started. First, that Catechism was not something I had officially "learned" as a child because my faith formation basically consisted of CCD classes where we drew pictures of Jesus and later, talked about our feelings. I wasn't really sure how to START. The answer, I learned from grammar and arithmetic, is to memorize the Catechism. The whole thing.
Second, that Catechism was a further Challenge to me in my re-version process. My personal faith life is not very liturgical (although I go to mass as often as possible and pray the Liturgy of the Hours.) But I don't pray "learned" prayers and it has been very hard for me in my reversion to pray from a book. It drives me a little batty when people say: "I will say a prayer," instead of "I will pray" or when they ask for a prayer for a specific situation. Prayer should be a loving dialogue, not a formula. SO I struggle with teaching people "learned" prayers.

Several years after I came home to Rome, I am now able to report that I can appreciate the value of praying "someone else's" prayer and that I certainly have incorporated more of that into my faith life. But one thing you need to understand about my family's prayer life, at least mine and my children's-- as my husband is more inclined to pray written prayers-- is that it's very spontaneous. Because of that, it didn't really occur to me that I should probably try to teach my kids the "Basic prayers" until I enrolled them in the CLAA, where that is a requirement for Catechism.
LOTS of people have asked me to explain how to teach young children to pray. Because I am so concerned that they get it in a "heart" way and not just "head" way, I usually just tell people to include God and conversations about and with God in your daily tasks. But for those who are trying to teach their kids the "Basic Prayers," there has been some concern over how old they should be, what method to use, etc.
To that I would say.... teach them from the beginning (ie. young.) Teach them every day (ie regularly). Eventually, they will get it. We've been doing the Our Father for about two weeks now officially (before that they heard it here and there and in mass) and my five year old can say it perfectly when she is paying attention. My almost four year old can say it with a few promptings, and my almost two year old says a long series of babbling that sounds just like it with a few additions, but VERY reverently. :D
Ever since I began teaching them the Lord's prayer, my five year old, who used to decline to pray by herself when I offered her the opportunity, often asks IF we can pray for any number of situations that we come across in our day. She used to ask me to pray for someone, and then say: "Let's pray. YOU say it." Now she happily prays for people, using the Our Father. I am confident that as she builds her relationship with Jesus she will learn to pray spontaneously also, but for now, I'm excited to see her so excited to pray for people. And because we study the MEANING of the Our Father in Catechism I, she doesn't think of it as a "formula," she thinks of it as calling on her Heavenly Father.
Give it a try, teach them to pray with their hearts, and then teach them some basic prayers

Mama Mondays- homeschool vs real life, go.

Before we started schooling this year, I worried that doing the CLAA was going to be "impractical" in some ways. The change seems so strict and so demanding, and I admit worried that the kids would have a hard time eventually fitting into a normal workday, where things are far less disciplined (yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I've worked.)  or normal relationships. I also worried that it would be a tough fit for OUR family.... we agree with the principles, but I knew that it would be difficult to implement a lot of it without a total overhaul of our system, and I was wary about that.
Did my kids really NEED uniforms? Wasn't all this rigidity going to get in the way of our "normalcy?" Was all this memorizing really the ONLY way? Was the schedule TOO disciplined? TOO rigorous? What about playtime?

All that changed this week as we finished up our first month of schooling. The first month was hard... I'm not going to lie. I determined to go the full mile, one step at a time, attacking everything that got in the way of our sainthood but not all at once, just as it became an issue.
For a practical example, I elected to use uniforms, but I didn't just buy a bunch of uniforms and throw everything else out. I began by making a one-a-day outfit for my kids over two weeks. Then I put everything else in a bag in the closet, out of reach but close enough to make sure I could get it if I needed. THEN I got rid of the bag, after  I saw we didn't need it. Then I replaced three of the days' uniforms with ACTUAL uniforms along the lines of what we want the kids to be wearing. In a few months, I will do that again. Until I'm pared down enough that I feel we have the clothing situation under control. I find that changes in small doses like that make them less difficult for everyone.... we work towards a goal (in our homeschool's case: less "stuff," more value, less play, more work, less foolishness, more wisdom, less whining, more praying.) Then we do whatever is in front of us at the time to meet that goal.
It really woke me up to how inattentive I had been as a parent and areas I had really let slide. At the same time, it was difficult for the kids.... here was ANOTHER brand new routine with new things to learn and none of them were "fun" in the beginning.
In the last week, my husband went to "real" work for the first time in years. Now, he has been hired on at the Fire Department, and his work consists at this point of succeeding at the Fire Academy.
I was challenged to the core by all of these changes, but let me tell you a little bit about what I discovered.

Every night, my husband comes home now with little notecards of policies and things he must learn. This means that he must .... wait for it...... memorize, word for word, whatever happens to be on those little cards in order to keep his new job. Just.Like. My kids.

He came home the first day of academy with armfuls of clothes. I looked on in amazement.... tee shirts, pants, work boots, jackets..... a uniform. I don't know why I hadn't thought about the fact that my husband would have a uniform from here on out. but there it was! Just. Like. My kids.

Then came the schedule. Again, discipline and hard work abound.... up early, lots of PT, difficult classes in which boredom and memorization of facts are the standard, hard work and learning under the "wing" of a more experienced firefighter, all peppered with a good dose of humbling reminders that you're at the bottom of the ladder. Also, neither my husband nor I have had any time for leisure activities the past two weeks. We have literally been busy from morning to night. But then the weekends, wow! Not only have we earned our weekends, but instead of spending weekends annoyed with each other because we've just been playing all week, we are grateful for the time together and generally amazed at how well we have enjoyed the leisure time we are given, playing hard and having so much fun.  Just. like. my kids.


Turns out the CLAA not only fits our lifestyle, but it basically IS our lifestyle. Turns out the practical lessons we are applying inside the home help my husband (and I, because now that I am working too I have to stay completely on task and not be sidetracked by the little things) tremendously in his endeavors outside the home. Turns out all this rigor and discipline and training and studying is exactly what we need in our adult lives, and we couldn't be more grateful that our kids are learning it now so that it won't take them thirty years to get it as adults. Most importantly, it turns out that schooling this way does not take away from our daily lives and "normalcy" at all.. in fact, I'm quite certain that in the last month we have been more productive, more efficient at communicating, and more on task and on target with our family goals, as well as more joyful and peaceful and optimistic, than we have been in years. Who knew a little hard work could do all that?

Now please pray for me that I don't get sidetracked, and that I stick with it, persevering to the end and winning the race. :)

I have been very comforted by this quote when I wanted to do something outside of our plan of life (like meet a struggling mom  for coffee during the week, or say yes to a playdate, or spend some time on the phone.)
Absence , isolation: trials for your perseverance. Holy Mass, prayer, sacraments, sacrifices, communion of the saints: weapons to conquer in the trial! (997, the Way, Josemaria Escriva)

St Josemaria, pray for us!

Mama Mondays-raising helpers

I love Simcha Fisher's blog on National Catholic Register. The other day, this one caught my eye..... in her usual hilarious way, she described the "actual" experience of having younger children "help" with the housework. It's true.... children are really very little "help" in the beginning.
In fact, their "help" is so totally useless that very often, mothers throw in the towel, chase the kids outside (or to the playroom) and roll up their sleeves.... because let's face it. No one really needs the extra work of scrubbing dishsoap off the floor, dough out of a drawer,  laundry soap off the laundry baskets, re-sorting laundry hampers and drawers, re-arranging books on the shelf, or picking up pieces of broken plate or glass.  In fact, the idea of taking the time to teach our kids to help is just......crazy.


You really want me to ADD to my eight-page to do list? And come on, isn't it better for their longterm health and welfare if I DON'T have to explain to them for the seventeen thousandth time why we WASH our hands first BEFORE drying them on the  dishtowel, because I'm pretty sure my patience is wearing thin.....
Simcha's solution was to say that eventually, it would all be over and she would have a nice clean house. No peanut butter on the carpet, no piles of rocks in the bottom of the washing machine.

She ended her post by saying: "one day they will be gone and it will be amazing."
I love that she ended it that way.... I am one of those people who thinks that everything has its season and that we should enjoy and do our best with what's right in front of us.
I feel sad for women who are not ALSO preparing to have an empty nest one day (ie. who give EVERYTHING to the kids but don't save some things for their marriage/personal journey), but I also feel sad for women who are anxiously awaiting it (not that Simcha is!) because I worry that they may be missing out on the blessing of having the kids there in the first place.

Me? I have a different outlook. (And this may be because I have what I call inexperiential optimism...  my family is still young-- Simcha has nine kids and I only have three so far.)

The helpers question is fair. It's confusing knowing they need to be helping, but also knowing our houses will never be put together unless we do it ourselves. I have friends who recommend any number of solutions, from sacrificing the extra space to have a playroom the kids stay in, to staying up once a week until early morning and getting the cleaning done while the babes are sleeping. I even know women who work part time JUST so they can hire a cleaning lady once a week.
It's hard knowing the right thing to do-- And knowing that ultimately, we will run ourselves into an early grave keeping legos off the floor and dust bunnies out of the corner if we don't enlist some kind of help. For some families, that means enlisting a maid or au père. For others, a parent or friend. But the question is-- how will we raise up children who don't collapse under the pressure themselves when their own kids are leaving lizards wrapped in tissue paper in the fridge and making floor paint out of diaper cream?

At the CLAA, we are encouraged to make our schedules about work and prayer, and you better believe that means that whatever times our kids are not spending agonizing over memory work at this stage they are basically just.... working. (I've retained a few Charlotte Mason elements I will not part with, such as the Nature Study, to give them time to do some "wonder and explore" stuff...but I'm still completely on board with the CLAA idea of "training" kids to work.)

Yes, you read that right-- the CLAA has some "lifestyle" recommendations to assist homeschooling families in using the curriculum... often made available through the forum in which you get a general sense of the way William Michael  thinks a "good" household is run. The reason? It's the founder's belief-- and I hope you understand I am not speaking for him, only paraphrasing from what I understand -- that most families who don't succeed at homeschooling don't succeed for two reasons. The FIRST is that they fail to provide the type of Christian family culture which will ultimately train a child to work, study, and live right, thus the children fail. The second is because the curriculum choices out there are inferior to the classical model. In other words, most CLAAers believe it's better to see a family homeschool using a curriculum other than the CLAA and yet DOING THE WORK of raising the family according to Christian standards of behavior and ethics than to see a family enrolled in CLAA and not doing the work it requires to educate their children in OTHER (non-academic) departments.

Now, the work ethic is the result, but the foundation is prayer, and for that reason the CLAA has requirements about religious life too. In fact, you might be interested to know that CLAA families are recommended to sacrifice a room in their home too.... not for a playroom to occupy the kids, but for a family chapel. And we LOVE the idea. Work and Prayer make for an incredible rhythm in the day-- for perfect peace, even, because as you will soon see if you implement this rule, peace begins to reign. But it is not easy, and as Simcha so perfectly pointed out, training children to help is..... rather painful.

 Because we spend so much time on that in the CLAA, I have become hyper sensitive (yes, in just three short weeks!) to all the excuses I hear about NOT getting to work outside of the CLAA.
It seems that in our culture, all we ever do is make excuses for NOT doing the hard stuff... and that hard stuff includes teaching our kids-- training them-- to work. In the three weeks I've been REALLY paying attention, I've noticed that the reasons I don't do it when I don't is either sheer laziness (I don't want to deal with the mess/meltdown/bad attitudes/excess of noise etc) OR sheer selfishness (I don't want them to do it because I want to do it the way I want to do it.)
It's fighting that urge to protect myself/my stuff/my time etc. that causes me to stop, take a deep breath, and say: (sometimes for the eight hundredth time) "Here, honey, let me show you."
So this week, whenever I was tempted to quickly do a mama-tornado through their bedroom because there were books scattered on the floor or their beds weren't made, I would take a deep breath and start to TEACH them.

Yes, it took two weeks of really forcing them to do the work before they got into a routine of actually DOING it. And you should know that in my house, my kids already do a pretty good amount of work compared to what I see their peers doing, so that should tell you that the things I'm learning in the CLAA are definitely a higher end commitment. The goal over there is nothing short of sainthood. And that means no shortcuts, just straight up obedience to our daily duty. (which, btw, doesn't necessarily mean you must figure out how to get all the work done between yourself and the kids. There is a time and place for outside help.... remember.... all things, in moderation.)

For the first time in my life, though... I'm seeing how disobedient I have been instead of patting myself on the back because my kids say please and thank you, or because they know how to put their shoes away when they come in the door.
What I like about is that this is MAMA training, and not just kid training... and the end result of that is that I'm focused on how much harder I need to work, and reminded of how I'm leading them, not just how THEY are doing. The whole family is making progress, and dad will too so long as he is involved in the process (in the CLAA, dads are hyper encouraged to be in leadership positions in the family homeschool.)

So when my five year old hits her brother and says: "that's what YOU GET for taking my sponge out of my hand," I'm reminded to lose my OWN sassy attitude when she comes crying to me... how many times have I rolled my eyes, raised my voice and grunted: "And that's what you get for not paying attention!"or some other such smartalec response??
Now I know to tell her, with great patience and care:  "I love you, my dear, and I"m sorry you got hurt. Next time you'll remember to pay close attention, won't you?" And then I can wink at my husband the next time we proudly listen to her say those very words to her little brother, who grabbed the sponge out of her hand again and slammed his hand into the wall in the process. :)

I should note here one more thing. I have noticed, in these three weeks also, that associations have made huge differences, both in myself and in my children, both good, and bad. When my children have played with other children who were not helpful, they came home ungrateful, rude, and challenging. When I myself have been around other mothers who are not helpful, I came home lazy, selfish, and nagging/screechy. One more reason that there is great wisdom in keeping a close eye on the effects of one's associations. And praying much, without which we will never make it.

Ironically, just as I finished writing this blog, my husband came home with a car load of groceries to put away.  Ordinarily, I chase the kids out of the kitchen and put things away myself, but when my three year old started begging to help I thought... well, I'd be a hypocrite if I said "no." So I rolled up my sleeves and took a step back, letting him and his five year old sister take over. I watched them dance about the kitchen, taking food out of the bags and organizing it by style on the countertops as they had seen me do endless times. They got out stools and partnered up to reach the really high spots. From time to time, they asked me to help them.... does this go in this drawer or right here? and mamma, can you make a little more room on this shelf for me to put this? I can't reach up there.
I laughed as my five year old explained the freezer to my three year old: No, the little one on top is the freezer, but mommy says that is backwards. She doesn't want all of Grandpa's stuff in the way in there, so she wants the big one to be the freezer and the little one to be the refrigerator. She says Americans just don't get it. Put it there, in the REAL freezer.
And then, just like that, they were done. I sucked in my breath.... Sure the nutrigrain bars were on top of the rice bags instead of underneath, and the olive packets weren't neatly stacked like I like them. But the food was put away.... All of it. And it was done RIGHT! And they had had fun doing it. And I wasn't cleaning milk off the ground. Amazing.

Here, now, is a list of recommendations I have for those who read Simcha's article and thought.... "EXACTLY!" but still wanted to do some thing more to make it work in their house instead of just throwing their hands up and having a good giggle.
Because it really can work! I do see families often in which the children, even the youngest, HELP around the house. And where peace reigns.

1. Make a schedule/routine. STICK TO IT, day in and day out.
2. be flexible if you need. (haha, you like that? I told you-- moderation!)
3. Don't take a break from parenting. Use every teachable moment.
4. Watch who you are with and check yourself often.
5. Create jobs. If kids are young , ANYTHING can be a job. Polishing doorknobs. Organizing grapes. Re-stringing rosaries. Gathering leaves. Etc. Take a cue from Army Basic Training, where I once spent an entire day gathering pine cones into plastic bags, then moving them halfway across a field and "arranging them in an esthetically pleasing manner." That was followed by a half day of moving sandbags from one side of a company area to another.
6. Have standards. No, you cant go out and play unless your bed is made, your clothes are hanging, and your books are neatly stacked. Etc. EVEN THOUGH it's playtime in the schedule.
7. Do community service projects TOGETHER.
8. Take a hint from Charlotte Mason, who suggests noticing your children's bad habits and replacing them with GOOD habits, one at a time, consistently.
9. If something is really wrong-- check yourself before being too hard on your child.
10. Smile a lot, and engage them in conversation that uplifts as you work.

Here are some pictures, old and new, of ways in which we have trained/are training our kiddos to be helpers/participators  in the home. Some of them include play/dress up, but I'm including them because they are for a purpose-- teaching them about their roles to help.

Happy Helping!