Spiritual Communion

I just finished sending a prayer request to a Carmelite Community in our Washington Province, The Carmel of Terre Haute.

I had never visited their website before, but when I read their "mission" and "vision" statements, I KNEW I was spiritually home. It was like... ZING! INSTANT companionship and shared spiritual experience.

It is so incredible to be able to say, with certainty, that I understand now why saying yes to God with regards to Carmel was so important in my life.
It's not so much that I have tried to cultivate Carmelite Spirituality as that it is Carmelite Spirituality which has sustained me and built itself into a tether firmly anchored in God, a tether which I strain to keep hold of and which I inch along, battling strong winds with sand in my eyes.

When I first came to Carmel, it was on a hunch-- I had a sense I needed to do something "more" with my life and that, since I liked to pray, and that's what Carmelites do, I should look into it.

As I discerned, I became increasingly uncertain that I "COULD" be a Carmelite, because of what was required of me and my situation in life. Though I felt somehow "connected," I didn't see any logical reason why that should be so... not even amongst the other Carmelites at the meetings I attended.

But over time, I have begun to learn that it was only by putting into practice the wisdom of these great Carmelite saints that I have even BEGUN to live the life that God intended for me. Meeting and talking with others who have been doing that long before I came along has substantially changed me... and helped me to lose that sense of "self importance" that is so token of a post-1970's upbringing.

I used to want, to ACHE to do something for God-- for that spark of recognition that people might see that my whole life was about him. I wanted to run a successful ministry, doing something with the gifts that God had given me, something that shouted : "Here is a woman who works for God!" What a prideful person I am.

Ironically, now I AM something--- I am something which most of the people I encounter, my friends even, don't understand and don't really think about, something which is hidden, silent, quiet (OK, did I mention I'm NEW at this?? :P) something which is both counter-cultural and totally suited to every culture, something which I will not be thanked for but which will tear from my soul, if I let it, every last stronghold of sinful passion and inordinate attachment and guide me not only to salvation but to union with the One who made me. What more could I want for my soul??

A year ago I received the scapular after an initial period of discernment and it is only NOW that I'm even beginning to understand what Carmel even IS, or what strange and beautiful communion I am destined to have with other souls who seek more than just eventual salvation but who are on fire to experience God's radical love. When I hear another person talking about John Of the Cross, now, I am stirred and moved to tears of joy for the fellowship, even if we do not talk at all.

In coming to Carmel, it's as if God has said:
"Look, there are others here, and there have been others here, who understand you perfectly, and better yet, I've given them the task of showing you the little way, the way that leads to the Narrow Gate. They will do so with great love. What they will teach you will be difficult, but what you will lose is meaningless and what you will find is Me."

These nuns, I discovered, have the following mission statement, which I am taking as my own since it perfectly describes what I am always striving to put into words:

Standing in the presence of the Living God, we worship and intercede for all, becoming channels of spiritual energy and a prophetic witness of hope to the world.


Their vision and mine?

To hold the lamp of contemplation until we become a Living Flame of love.

All sisters and brothers of Carmel, pray for me.

On internet debates- this is a note I typed up for facebook

When our ideas are met with opposition, we are forced to examine them and make a case for them. Only then do we know if what we believe is truly "true"-- because it has withstood the logic test, the test of time and the test of persecution. Strangers on the Internet--even friends-- have the funniest way of handing you your rear end without giving it a second thought.
We call that keyboard bravado- it's easy to be brave, and say what you think, when you are hidden behind a screen. Not always so easy in real life.
There is nothing quite like sharing an hour or two with several dozen people who think everything you stand for is idiotic- or worse, abherrant. Over time, if you persist in these conversations you begin to gain a sense of admiration or fondness for your worthy "opponent" in the debate. Ideological walls remain, but you begin to seek out-- and find-- common ground. Mutual respect is cultivated, and a deep reverence for the other person's human dignity ensues. This makes way for perfect charity... Which is how people who have publicly sworn at me and accused me of facism or sexism have afterwards sent me boxes of baby clothes or get-well-soon cards, how people who have literally spent entire nights arguing can also spend an entire night giggling over a plate of goat cheese spaghetti or sharing in the experience of labor and birth together.
Often, people who have regularly debated these "hard things" of life become jaded-- it's easy to lose heart when we hear the same questions, the same answers over and over and over again. Sometimes, if we don't also take the time to be "filled," it can be devastating to our own beliefs.
Most forums consist of random strangers having conversations, which makes for quite a different dynamic than here on Facebook, where we are, in theory, "friends."
Strangers don't mind telling you exactly what they think, and in the end, you become friends, or at least admire each other.... it is pure honesty.
"Friends," however, don't always share their thoughts and lives with you. Friends are easily offended, and easily misread you because you expect them to "know" you better and thus don't take the time to explain yourself. In the end, you might realize that there is little honesty and much misunderstanding. The internet is full of irony.
A debate in your pajamas is far more intimate and "real" than a debate at a formal dinner party. The internet breaks down barriers, but it requires prudence and sincerity to achieve your goal, be it personal growth, evangelism, or edification. Only the person who has set out to waste his time will waste his time.

In the end, a bond of common human unity is built- a respect for the human dignity of each person you encounter, while reinforcing, I think, that some of us are not of this world.
We can *facepalm* or we can light up-- we can be disgusted or we can be totally enraptured and moved. Some of the most meaningful emails I have received have come from relative strangers I've only met in internet land, while some of the most difficult and painful moments I've experienced have come at the hands of friends and acquaintances. A man I tagged in this note, who I had never met in real life, once called me out on living a double life (half Christian, half utterly worldly.) He was pushing my buttons, but he was right.I had been deceiving myself. My life changed, I became a better follower of Christ thanks to a person who, at this time, doesn't really find himself engaged in a personal relationship with Christ. There is irony there, but there is beauty, too.

This is why some days, we receive violence and abuse and other days praise in an environment like this... Because our prudence and our faith is constantly being tested. Sometimes people fail us, other times we fail them. But always, we grow. We are stretched. We learn, or we give up. And with each other. The challenge, for us, is to keep in mind the objective-- why are we here?

I was here to be an open book, but if I'm an open book and no one picks me up to read me, only glancing briefly at a few words here or there, or staring at the cover intently... well, I'm going to be misunderstood. And it will hurt. Other times, I will be understood. And it will hurt.
The important thing, the way I see it, is to prayerfully keep in mind the goal... why am I here? I have not done this, lately, but I needed the reminder. So thank you!

The internet is life, accelerated.

incidentally, I would have tagged Nash but I can't find him on my friends' list... I think he defriended me. :-P
If I didn't tag you and you're an R&P or Raveler, it's because i reached the tag limit.

A modesty primer, for the curious.

Inevitably, as I write about and "put out there" some of my thoughts on an issue (via Twitter, Facebook, and right here) I get emails and responses from people who are also thinking about these things and have questions. Modesty is no different.
Today I got an email from someone who has been reading and thinking about modesty as well, but who is not really certain about where to begin and what it all means for HER.
Soooo, I thought that would be a great topic for a blog: an overview of modern clothing, some ideas on where to begin, etc etc.

First things first: History.
Historically speaking, women (and men, for that matter) have never been as "uncovered" as they are in our generation. Over time, of course, there have been fashions which rose and fell that exposed certain parts of our bodies (bustles, low bustlines.... hello?) But not until this century, and even the last forty years, have women been truly able to "bare all" the way that they do.
We have been fed the idea that this is liberation, this is freedom. But is it? It's up to you to decide. I'm not a fashion historian, but I think you'll agree that as a general rule, fashion used to be FAR more functional than flattering, and has always been about SAYING SOMETHING- making a message. If you were poor, your clothes said that you worked hard and suffered much.
If you were rich enough to afford new clothes, you chose clothes that said something about who you were. Things are not that different today, in that sense. Our clothes send a message. Modest clothes send the message that modesty is important to us.
Further, our clothes are no longer functional. Many of us have abstained from one activity or another because we were not "dressed for the occasion." What does that say about us since we are called in scripture to be "All things for all people?"

But what IS modest?

We live in a world where there are truly no more standards. Anything goes. Thus, nothing is truly shocking anymore... except radical modesty. In the city I live in, a military town, there is an abundance of "gentlemen's" (haha) clubs lining the main streets. Often times, in the late morning, strippers and their boyfriends will grab lunch and then head back to work. They do not cover up much from their "work clothes." At these moments, I've noticed, it is getting harder and harder to tell an ACTUAL stripper from a regular girl... and I've also noticed that while men continue to leer and women continue to look disgusted, very few people actually say anything to a woman dressed in a completely revealing outfit. Well, other than the whistling, cat calls, etc.
On the other hand, when I go out covered up, EVERYONE has something to say to me. It's very bizarre.
Because of this lack of standards, it's very hard to say what constitutes "modest" and what doesn't. Whereas one person may find admirable the wearing of something like this:


Another might find that totally immodest and prefer something like this:



But even then, another might see that and find it completely innapropriate, choosing instead to look like this: (and I love this picture because it was taken in my hometown and it just goes to show how totally DIFFERENT our concepts of modesty truly are...)



Even among women who wear Hijab (and thus completely observe a specific law of modesty) there is disagreement about what that entails... Abaya (overcoat) or not, cover face or not, etc. All this to say that I think the question is not so much "how much" to show but what the interior motives of your heart might be. In your particular faith tradition, there must be some sort of historical movement towards modesty and perhaps the wise choice would be to cling to that.

For example, I am a Catholic, and all traditional Catholics know that we women are called to a Mary-like modesty, to ask ourselves... would the Blessed Virgin Mary wear this? If that's too broad a question, it has been made real simple for us:

Imprimatur dated Sept. 24, 1956
"A dress cannot be called decent which is cut deeper than two fingers breadth under the pit of the throat; which does not cover the arms at least to the elbows; and scarcely reaches a bit beyond the knees. Furthermore, dresses of transparent materials are improper."
The Cardinal Vicar of Pius XII

In other words, anything LESS than this would be uncatholic and immodest, anything more, it follows, would be modest enough. Catholicism lends great importance to human dignity and to individual freewill and intention. Thus, for a Catholic to cover her face would probably not be ideal. That being said, there is nothing that says a Catholic can not do so.

Women of other faiths have other guidelines to go on.... Church fathers, certain pastors they like, rabbinical regulations or Quranic verse. Whatever the case may be, if you are personally exploring modesty as an option for yourself, I would start there.
The other thing I would try to remember is that it's not only about WHAT you cover it's about HOW you do it-- in other words, you can be wearing long sleeves and long pants but if they are skintight, it's not considered modest.

The second thing I would ask myself is: "Am I willing to adopt a modest ATTITUDE alongside my new modest clothing?" If you are not, then you might as well keep dressing the way you have been all along, because you haven't changed a thing. Clothes are just clothes. Modesty is designed to help us increase in the virtue of Chastity, by which we offer ourselves a living sacrifice to God, having rigorously trained the flesh to be in submission to the Spirit. The clothes are there to help the person fight the battles of the flesh.

The Headcovering issue.

I have done and redone the headcovering issue to death, so I won't do it again here, but suffice to say that I think it's pretty clear that all three major abrahamic faiths have the same standards of modesty and of headcovering. Thus, it is my personal opinion that women should veil. That being said-- the veil adds a whole new dimension to the modesty factor in your clothing AND makes a mark on you spiritually so that I recommend starting off by JUST switching to modest clothes, since veiling without modest clothes looks strange and defeats the purpose of veiling. Then, once you are comfortable with wearing modest clothes I recommend veiling for Church and prayer, not fulltime at first. As time goes on, you will decide if it's something you can do. But you cannot do it all right off the bat and then change your mind-- the effect that has on the "watchers" around you is very real.

So what happens when you start?

After selecting the type of clothes you are planning on wearing, of course, the next step is to actually wear them. This will need to be gradual if you are making a BIG change, and can be done right away without looking back if you are making small changes. For instance... my mother in law, parents, etc are still TOTALLY wierded out by my fashion choice. So in order not to shock them too much, I try to be more discreet and less obvious about what I'm doing when I'm around them(think: long sleeve shirt and long skirt + long bandana instead of an abaya and shayla wrap.)
That being said, I highly recommend just circling a date on your calendar, once you've been "trying it" a while, and just saying "From this day forward I will get rid of all my other clothes and not look back." For me, that day is August 15 of this year, the day of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary into Heaven. :-)
Also, be aware: you will get looks, you will get questions, you will get cornered. Think ahead of time about how you will respond to different scenarios, because I cannot say enough how revolutionary the act of not showing one's body is in our society.

How do I start?

The biggest recommendation I can make to you is to shop online. The stores these days are full of garbage that is unusable to a modesty-conscious woman and I cannot tell you how much time and money you will save if you buy and plan your new wardrobe online. Start by going through your closet and bagging up all the things you will no longer be wearing. Then figure out what you need more of-- usually it's layering tees and longer skirts for most women.
There is a GREAT modest clothing directory for women of ALL faith backgrounds here:

http://www.modestclothes.com/

I would recommend starting there and then filling in with some basics you are missing (I'm STILL saving up for some long sleeve tissue tees!! Haha.)

Lots of people worry about how to overcome the heat. Let me be the first to tell you: heat is not an issue when you wear modest clothing in natural fabrics (ie not polyester.) It is waaaaaaay cooler in a light colored linen abaya and dress than it is in jeans and a tee shirt. WAY cooler. Infinitely cooler. So there's that. Avoid polyester like the plague in the summer. It traps all heat close to the body.

And that's basically it. If you think about your wardrobe TOO much you will defeat the whole purpose of modesty, I think. So pick something, pray about it, stick to it, and let me know how it goes!

Welcome to the sisterhood of the modest world. It's awesome here.



Further thoughts for Catholics:

Imprimatur dated Sept. 24, 1956
"A dress cannot be called decent which is cut deeper than two fingers breadth under the pit of the throat; which does not cover the arms at least to the elbows; and scarcely reaches a bit beyond the knees. Furthermore, dresses of transparent materials are improper."
The Cardinal Vicar of Pius XII
"The good of our soul is more important than that of our body; and we have to prefer the spiritual welfare of our neighbor to our bodily comforts. If a certain kind of dress constitutes a grave and proximate occasion of sin, and endangers the salvation of your soul and others, it is your duty to give it up. O Christian mothers, if you knew what a future of anxieties and perils, of ill-guarded shame you prepare for your sons and daughters, imprudently getting them accustomed to live scantily dressed and making them lose the sense of modesty, you would be ashamed of yourselves and you would dread the harm you are making of yourselves, the harm which you are causing these children, whom Heaven has entrusted to you to be brought up as Christians."
Pius XII to Catholic Young Women's Groups of Italy
THIS LEAFLET DISTRIBUTED BY: THE LEAGUE FOR MODESTY IN DRESS, NY
The Church speaks about Modesty
Pope Benedict XV has taught very clearly about modesty in an encyclical letter (Sacra Propediem, 1921), commemorating the 7th centenary of the founding of the Franciscan Third Order.


"One can not sufficiently deplore the blindness of so many women of every age and station. Made foolish by a desire to please, they do not see to what degree the indecency of their clothing shocks every honest man and offends God. Most of them would formerly have blushed for such apparel as for a grave fault against Christian modesty. Now it does not suffice to exhibit themselves on public thoroughfares; they do not fear to cross the threshold of churches, to assist at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, and even to bear the seducing food of shameful passions to the Eucharistic Table, where one receives the Heavenly Author of Purity."

1930 Letter of the Congregation of the Council

By virtue of the supreme apostolate which he wields over the Universal Church by Divine Will, our Most Holy Father Pope Pius XI has never ceased to inculcate, both verbally and by his writings, the words of St. Paul (1 Tim. xi,9-10), namely, "Women ... adorning themselves with modesty and sobriety ... and professing godliness with good works."

Very often, when occasion arose, the same Supreme Pontiff condemned emphatically the immodest fashion of dress adopted by Catholic women and girls -- which fashion not only offends the dignity of women and against her adornment, but conduces to the temporal ruin of the women and girls, and, what is still worse, to their eternal ruin, miserably dragging down others in their fall. It is not surprising, therefore, that all Bishops and other ordinaries, as is the duty of ministers of Christ, should in their own dioceses have unanimously opposed their depraved licentiousness and promiscuity of manners, often bearing with fortitude the derision and mockery leveled against them for this cause.

Therefore this Sacred Council, which watches over the discipline of clergy and people, while cordially commending the action of the Venerable Bishops, most emphatically exhorts them to persevere in their attitude and increase their activities insofar as their strength permits, in order that this unwholesome disease be definitely uprooted from human society.

In order to facilitate the desired effect, this Sacred Congregation, by the mandate of the Most Holy Father, has decreed as follows:




Exhortation to Those in Authority

1. The parish priest, and especially the preacher, when occasion arises, should, according to the words of the Apostle Paul (2 Tim. iv, 2), insist, argue exhort and command that feminine garb be based on modesty and womanly ornament be a defense of virtue. Let them likewise admonish parents to cause their daughters to cease wearing indecorous dress.

2. Parents, conscious of their grave obligations toward the education, especially religious and moral, to their offspring, should see to it that their daughters are solidly instructed, from earliest childhood, in Christian doctrine; and they themselves should assiduously inculcate in their souls, by word and example, love for the virtues of modesty and chastity; and since their family should follow the example of the Holy Family, they must rule in such a manner that all its members, reared within the walls of the home, should find reason and incentive to love and preserve modesty.

3. Let parents keep their daughters away from public gymnastic games and contests; but if their daughters are compelled to attend such exhibitions, let them see that they are fully and modestly dressed. Let them never permit their daughters to don immodest garb.

4. Superioresses and teachers in schools for girls must do their utmost to instill love of modesty in the hearts of maidens confided to their care and urge them to dress modestly.

5. Said Superioresses and teachers must not receive in their colleges and schools immodestly dressed girls, and should not even make an exception in the case of mothers of pupils. If, after being admitted, girls persist in dressing immodestly, such pupils should be dismissed.

6. Nuns, in compliance with the Letter dated August 23, 1928, by the Sacred Congregation of Religious, must not receive in their colleges, schools, oratories or recreation grounds, or, if once admitted, tolerate girls who are not dressed with Christian modesty; said Nuns, in addition, should do their utmost so that love for holy chastity and Christian modesty may become deeply rooted in the hearts of their pupils.

7. It is desirable that pious organizations of women be founded, which by their counsel, example and propaganda should combat the wearing of apparel unsuited to Christian modesty, and should promote purity of customs and modesty of dress.

8. In the pious associations of women those who dress immodestly should not be admitted to membership; but if, perchance, they are received, and after having been admitted, fall again into their error, they should be dismissed forthwith.

9. Maidens and women dressed immodestly are to be debarred from Holy Communion and from acting as sponsors at the Sacraments of Baptism and Confirmation; further, if the offense be extreme, they may even be forbidden to enter the church.

Donato Cardinal Sbaretti, Prefect
Congregation of the Council
Rome, January 12, 1930

Lessons in a life of prayer

I promised the other day that I would write a little bit about some further insights I have gained through the practice of complete modesty in dress.

The first thing is that because I am a Christian and not a Muslim, the purpose of my headcovering is Obedience to God and a demonstration that I am submitted to the proper authority. It is NOT out of modesty. Thus I am commanded to cover when I pray or prophesy in 1 Corinthians 11 as a sign to the angels, and later in 1 Timothy to pray without ceasing.
Where a muslim woman who spent as much time at home as I do (and many of them do) might spend all that time UNcovered, I am not technically supposed to. That being said, I find that going uncovered at home and putting on a veil when I am CONSCIOUSLY about to stop and pray has been a practice that increased the "gravity" of the moment when I actually stop and turn to God. Because of that I am basically NOT covering at home unless I am stopping to pray. More on that in a moment.

Modesty is not something that comes naturally to me. I'm not very "aware" of my latent sensuality and I'll be honest, since having my children I am certainly no longer the sexy young thang that I used to be, so I don't totally see the "necessity" of it in my current state. I grew up on the beaches of southern France and south California and we certainly didn't wear much either place. I no longer really struggle much with lust or inappropriate sexual behavior, so it's just kind of a non-issue. UNTIL I stop and think about others. That's when it becomes crystal clear that we SHOULD pay attention to what we do/wear. That modesty is more than just "covering up..." because I can tell you that you can cover from head to toe, but if your HEART isn't modest, it shows RIGHT through your clothes.
Muslim women have a practice of not looking non-related men in the eye. What an incredible testament to their commitment to chastity! Would that we would similarly be so concerned.

It is hard for me, each day, to step outside covered. I don't mind covering my hair-- I actually love that part, but to cover the rest of me makes me very uncomfortable.
Well, let me explain that better. The ACTUAL comfort level of my body is much improved. I am free to move whichever way I choose without giving it much thought, and if I am smart about it, it's actually easier to stay cool on hot days and warm on cold days. It is a HUGE blessing to me never to have to tug at a creeping shirt again, or to worry about pulling clothes any direction to cover my post-baby body or my milk factory. Jeans have ALWAYS fallen right off me (I have no butt) so I find that wearing Hijab (and I actually have been wearing an Abaya or overgarment) is SUPER comfy... I don't have to stress out about pulling my pants up every time I stand, etc.
On the other hand, it takes some serious guts to go out with nothing hanging out. I have to tell you, EVEN WITHOUT THE HEADCOVERING people stare, stare, stare at you if you are wearing a long dress that goes down to your wrists and ankles.
This makes me nervous and also makes me feel like I'm not pretty, which of course is simply not true. I am obviously a victim of my culture because to leave the house THIS covered up makes me feel like I look ugly.
Many of you will ask... why do it, then? The answer is that it seems clear to me from my response that I attach too much importance to fashion and the way I look. The reality is that I am happily married to a man who thinks I am beautiful, and that I am a busy mother to three young children. I have no need to be "fashionable" other than to "make myself feel good..." and the truth is that in doing the opposite of what I "desire" to do I am able to emotionally detach from that very need and instead cleave to God, which is spiritual advancement.
I waste a great deal of time feeling "bad" because I can't make myself look as pretty as I would like-- (no time for curling hair etc.) Even when I DO get the time, I am still unsatisfied with my appearance. This is not conducive to putting me at peace. Modest dressing, however, does.

St John of the Cross, a Carmelite Doctor of the Church advised us that it would bear great spiritual fruit to do the opposite of what we desire to do. Want to put two lumps of sugar in your coffee? Choose none. Tempted to watch TV? Pray instead. Want to kick your feet up? Do some dishes. Enjoy dressing up and wearing lots of accessories, etc? Wear Hijab.
This negation, when it isn't rooted in a weird, legalistic place ends up satisfying us with a more pure satisfaction, because we are constantly trying to find pleasure and enjoyment in the creation, but what we REALLY earnestly desire is the CreatOR. These practices help us to find all we need in Him. Is it extreme? Totally. But I serve an extreme God, who was willing to DIE on the cross for my sins. It isn't too much for me to do something like this to draw closer to Him, to be able to hear Him more clearly and contemplate His presence here with me.

Which brings me to the second point I wanted to make, and this one relates to a lesson I've learned in prayer combined with the practice of wearing modest clothing.
As I said before, about a month before my husband approached me about wearing a headcovering, I had REALLY been struggling with my faith in Vatican II as a "legitimate" council. I'll be honest-- I still am and really always have been. So one of the things that kept coming up on my radar and sort of "bleeping" at me was this question of the new Catechism saying that Muslims and Catholics serve the same God. As a former evangelical who FIRMLY believes that Allah is not the same God as the God of the Bible, I have major issues with this statement as it is written in the Catechism.
Any Catholic should-- it is totally inconsistent with what we know about Christianity and what we know about Islam. (Islam, for example, denies the Holy Trinity -- big no, no if you're a Christian-- and also denies the whole point of Christianity, which is that Jesus Christ, who was fully God and fully man, died on the cross for our sins.) How can this be the same God? For me, this is a blaring inconsistency added by Vatican II that makes me shudder... and wonder if those SSPXers aren't right after all. Still, to keep the faith, despite the turmoil within... for the gates of hell shall not prevail....

But I digress. As I attempt to reconcile what I am sure I concretely "know" as truth
to what, I will freely admit were some very icky feelings I had begun to harbor towards muslims because of 9-11,and the last few years of religious debate going on in internet-land, and having decided to believe John of the Cross who says "Where there is no love, put love, and there you will find love," (Amen!) I committed to doing something which I have never done before. I chose a "people group" as we say in Evangelical-land that I wanted to pray for a better relationship with and an opportunity to minister to, and I began to pray in conjunction with them-- strategically-- for their conversion (which, in Catholic terms means "for them to be drawn into Union with God)

Muslims pray five times a day. When the prayer time rings/calls/alarms, they make wudu, which means that they take care to wash hands, feet and faces. They cover up their hair and bodies. They get out a prayer rug. They orient their bodies towards the east, where the kaaba is. They say their prayers. And then they go back to doing what they were doing (sleep, work, school, watching Tv... whatever.)

This is very similar to what Catholics monastics do, of course. The liturgy of the hours causes me to stop seven times during the day, place myself in the presence of God and say a series of prayers. The difference between me and a muslim woman, though, is profound. Her first call to prayer goes off at around 4 am, as does mine. But hers requires her to get up, change her clothes, her position, etc... whereas I can sit in my bed and say mine.
Meditating on this, I decided that if muslim women were able to dress differently, look different "in the world" and abnegate their personal vanity in order to serve God, and I was going to join them in doing so, then I certainly could join them in making the extra efforts to pray worthily.

What better way to get a feel for the experience of life of muslims, to learn to love them more and better, and to truly understand them, than to do something like this? Likewise, how shameful that Christians, who profess to serve the "True" God and believe it to be so, don't OUT DO Muslims in their pious practices and in their exercise of virtue? How dare we say we believe or that Muslims must be converted if we are not willing to do what they do and more to serve our own God? Christians could learn quite a bit from the fervent love for God which is professed each time a woman goes out in her hijab or each time prayer takes precedent over sleep, food, or other pleasures.
Further, if, as the catechism alleges, we worship the same God, would He not be MORE pleased to see us encouraging each other in our pious practices and in our worship than to see us looking down one upon the other? Surely it is good for us to be blameless in the sight of ALL people. How many Muslims find solace and "truth" in their religion because they look to our churches and see them filled with hypocrites-- with women wearing practically nothing who profess to be believers? How much would this change if Christian women were not so obstinate in their "freedom" to dress as they pleased?

With this in mind, I downloaded an app to my iphone which calls me to prayer at the same time as all of the Muslims in my time zone. When the alarm goes off, I make wudu the only way I know how- I wash my hands, feet, and face... and then bless myself with Holy Water since the whole point of Wudu as I understand it is for purification of the senses. I cover my hair. I get out a prayer rug which I had been given as a gift more than five years ago and never used. And I orient myself towards the nearest Tabernacle. I pray the prayer of the angel at Fatima, a prayer of reparation for blasphemy against the Holy Trinity. And then I pray an act of consecration for the world to the Sacred Heart of Jesus which specifically mentions Islam.
I've been considering learning the Our Father and the Hail Mary and Apostles Creed in Arabic because we are now attending a Maronite Church and these will probably come in handy some day anyways. And while I'm at it, I usually pray the LOH.
The angel at Fatima taught the children to pray in a manner very similar to the way muslims pray, with their faces against the ground. And so I do this--- offering up this sacrifice of praise as an act of reparation but also as a way to unite my prayers to those of muslims everywhere who seek to please the One God who made heaven and earth... in particular for their individual conversions and enlightenment of their understanding of who God is.

It is HARD and inconvenient stopping what I'm doing each day to pray at the appointed times. Unlike the LOH, which has specific guidelines but which gives you a lot of leeway as far as the clock goes, these muslim prayers are to happen at specific times. As a result I am totally amazed at the level of commitment that it takes to actually pray them. This makes me realize the mercy that God has for fervent muslims.
More importantly, it helps me to pray for their spiritual welfare and to stop thinking of them with my "us vs them" mentality, rather seeing them as fellow human beings, worthy of great dignity, earnestly striving for God's truth.

May we Catholics always be a shining beacon of light for Muslim people. Amen.

More on headcovering and the mission

Today marks the beginning of the second week that I've gone back to headcovering fulltime.

This has been a fascinating branch of my faith-journey, one that has been completely filled with God's gentle direction. Because I have lots of internet-sisters in Christian headcovering, but none in real life, I thought I would share a little bit about it.

For those of you who don't know, I used to cover my head regularly while in college. This was after I had gotten serious with God and wanted to do something to help to both tame my vanity, which was just completely out of control, while simultaneously boosting my "self-esteem" (at least, my sense of being loved and cared for by God) and in a sense by making reparation (though I didn't know what that meant at the time)for my overtly sinful sexual history.
At the time, I felt compelled to wear clothes that were basically in accordance with the Jewish laws of modesty: 3/4 length skirts, 3/4 length tops, and a veil of some sort (I usually wore a square headscarf folded in two and secured behind my neck)



This was a "halfway point" between the world of lowrise jeans and the world of abaya-wearing muslimahs, and my friends (none of whom felt compelled to cover their heads, despite what the Bible says) didn't seem to think I was that weird.
And fortunately, it was UN-covered enough that if/when I went out on the weekends and "forgot my religion" so to speak... (and let's face it, there were MANY moments like these before I started taking my faith seriously!) no one noticed a big "difference" in the way that I dressed. In fact, lots of people never even noticed that I covered regularly at all.. It was covering on the sly.

I stopped headcovering about five years later, when I joined the US ARMY, and thereafter because I got married and my husband didn't particularly like the idea.

When my husband and I first came back to the issue this year--- he being a much more enthusiastic supporter of headcovering now than he was then-- it became obvious to me that I had never TRULY considered my own modesty. It was fun to observe Tznius, and it certainly "FELT" holy, but it was also not a permanent mark on me.. something that people around me could define me by. (Not because of any modesty deficiency in clothes that reflect Jewish spirituality, but because it isn't really THAT different from what your average, modest, non-headcovering woman would wear.)

This time around, we recognized that this was something which we would be forced to consider more deeply than just "leaving the house with a covering on." When I wear the scarf, I am perpetually made aware of certain things because it is a constant reminder. (it gets hot, it gets snagged on stuff, everyone stares, etc.)This makes it something to consider before you take it on, not something to begin rashly. After all, the world is watching. It takes prudence.

When people know / assume you cover for religious reasons, you think twice about your public actions. When you wear the scarf in private as well-- it's the same story for your private actions. This is a great incentive to wear the veil-- it guarantees to help you with resistance against habitual sin.

Now, when you wear a specific STYLE of scarf, it speaks to a specific culture. There is a whole "look" that goes with that that you cannot simply ignore--- for example, wearing an abaya (long, full coverage overdress) and a kerchief or bonnet would look strange to people, as they associate the abaya with Hijab, the islamic dress code. Likewise, one cannot wear a sleeveless shirt and a scarf that covers the head AND neck. It looks silly as a fashion statement... and makes no theological sense. There are other considerations to be made as well. Recently I was out in a "very covered" outfit (nothing showing but my face, a strip of my hair, and my hands and feet. I realized that people around me probably assumed that I was a muslim. Some of them may even BE muslims. Which made me scarfing down my usual two strips of bacon with my breakfast kinda iffy--- I didn't want to scandalize anyone or worse, get chewed out by someone for eating food that was obviously not "OK." At the same time, I'm NOT a practicing Jew, and I'm NOT a Muslim. So why should it bother me to eat bacon in public? In the end, I opt to avoid the bacon, which gives me an opportunity to make a small sacrifice, and also to make a gesture of goodwill towards people who are trying to serve God the best way they know how (like, by not eating bacon.)
Sounds complex, huh? It gets worse.

There's the whole Muslim issue. It goes without saying that when you cover in the most modest and sensible (and fuss-free) manner, you look like a Muslim to 99 percent of the world. But that's because people don't know their history. Veiling in that manner is FAR older than Islam and is actually, before anything else, a cultural phenomenon that has represented different things at different times.

That being said...Judaism, Christianity and Islam all prescribe headcovering and modesty, and for most of the history of the world women have been covered, at least in prayer. One can hardly imagine a painting or statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary, for example, without her veil... it's a part of who she is.

It isn't "FAIR" that you get thought of as a Muslim when you cover your head, but it is what it is. When I first returned to the Catholic Church I was overjoyed that I could cover my head without being the weird one. Surprise! I was the only one in my parish who did. I guess the times they have a-changed. :P

I continued to choose a stole (my favorite) over a "chapel veil" for some time, until I gave up and started using a chapel veil (they have definitely grown on me!) Suddenly lots of women in my parish seemed interested and began to cover-- I guess all it took was not looking so.... Muslim. :P
Which is why I LOVE it (and kick myself for wearing a chapel veil instead of a face framing stole) when I see an arab or indian Catholic woman at mass-- they almost always end up wearing the most stunning and simple "muslim-looking" outfits and giving me hope that someday I can just be accepted in these types of clothes without having to explain myself.

All this to say that there are plenty of factors that get put into the decision to begin veiling again, and they are not things we should take lightly. My veil makes me a witness to the world, and demonstrates my interior desire to be set apart. But hidden behind the veil lies a heart which must choose to do good or the veil becomes meaningless.

In Christianity, we are commanded to be modest. But we are not given guidelines as far as what that means. Catholics have, in the past, been encouraged to ask themselves "How would Mary dress?" and to inquire whether they are putting forth an image which is chaste and subdued. In one apparition, the Blessed Mother herself even warned us that "certain fashions would arise which would greatly offend our Lord." I am certain this is the case when I look around today at what new lows "liberated" women have sunk to in their selection of attire. Frankly, the further away I get from a culture which is saturated with dirty, wrongful sex, the more disgusted I become with today's "fashion," which offends the dignity of women and draws lust at every occasion.
The veil, however, is not about modesty in Christianity. We are commanded to veil in SUBMISSION... out of obedience towards God and "as a sign for the angels," according to St Paul.
Who would want to miss this blessing--that angels take to flight at our prayers because of our submission to God?
In Catholicism, we veil those things which are precious and sacramental... which are reserved for God and those men who are his. This is one last and final reason why veiling, in my eyes, is a gift to women.

In short-- when we make a decision to veil, we must give up quite a bit. Our "freedom" to choose whatever we want to wear according to moods and seasons is restricted, albeit willingly. We will no longer be lusted-after (God willing!) and harassed by men in the streets. We will no longer be "looked up to" by worldly-minded women. People will stare. They will wonder what's wrong with us. They will even be rude!
On the other hand, we acquire God's blessing in a special way. We are given grace which assists us in being freed from many of our habitual sins. We are made holy, and precious in His sight. Most importantly, we are protected... to veil is to protect ourselves from our own sin and the sins of others, and to protect others in society from our own sin and their own sin. What better thing to do if we truly WANT to be Holy and accept Christ's destiny for us?

So, obviously, the minute my husband began to show interest I was ALL OVER the question and anxious to get started again. Longtime blog readers now that I have always worn a veil over my heart. ;)
How would I do it? The first week or so of praying about it I found that my vanity actually INCREASED. I worried about what was too "over the top," and ways to make it easier to NOT veil for certain occasions etc.

You see, for Muslim women and Jewish women who decide to veil, it is relatively easy-- there are laws set in place and one must only submit to them. Christianity, however, is not so simple. We must seek the Holy Spirit, and test the spirit when we get an answer. We must submit to certain authorities (the Church, our husbands.)
We must consider compassion and generosity towards others. (will I cause a scandal by doing this?)
With all this in mind, here are the "rules" for headcovering that my husband and I came up with for myself.



First, I will not get so bent out of shape over the TYPE of covering that it will cause me to pay more attention to the covering than to what is truly important. What that means is that while I will cover a certain way most of the time (Full, face framing wrap) I will not flip out if, while in a hurry to leave the house or when going into a particular situation which makes this type of covering impractical or imprudent, I am not able to cover in the manner I have chosen. Ie... if the situation arises that I have to wear a bandanna or -gasp- nothing, I am not to flip out. This guards me from my vanity and keeps me from legalism.

Secondly, I will strive to wear it in conjunction with truly modest clothing or not at all. For us... modest meant long skirts/(feminine) pants and at least 3/4 sleeves which are not form fitting and which are not cut far below the collarbone.
This rigidity helps me not to spend hours fretting about what to wear...it simplifies my daily decisions and helps me to always stay on the "safe side."

ThirdI will wear the veil at all times when in public, and strive to wear it when I am at home but around men whom I would not consider "family." I will also wear it at all times during liturgical prayer. (Mass, Divine Office, etc)

FourthIn keeping with the Carmelite Rule to which I am bound, I will NOT spend endless amounts of time/money on superficial methods of bypassing the fact that I am wearing modest clothes by making them particularly "adapted" to modern culture. *this means that I wont shop til I drop for cute scarves and whatnot, but rather just take and accept that which is given to me and purchase as needed without going into excess. I don't need a CLOSET full of modest clothes. Modesty means temperance in my appearance, which means I don't need to spend "extra" time or money other than what it takes to make myself look presentable and clean, ie.respectable.

Fifth I will strive to remember that "pretty" starts within and that external "prettiness" is a result of internal peace with God. One is a virtue. The other is not.

And so, with that in mind ,I embarked last week on this new headcovering journey.
So far it has been totally interesting. I live in "The All American City," on a military base, and that makes this whole "looking like a Muslim" experience all the more interesting since many of these people are the wives of soldiers, and the soldiers themselves, who are out "hunting terrorists" in Iraq and Afghanistan. This makes me a little nervous, as people have not been shy about expressing their distaste for me in a few places I've been. It's an eye opener, and when the opportunity has arisen for me to confront people with their own bigotry by actually sparking up a conversation, for example, with an offender-- or worse yet, by confusing the heck out of them by making the sign of the cross before eating or pulling out my bible... well, it truly becomes, I think, a testament to the strength of Faith in Christ when they become aware that not only am I willing to be ridiculed like this but even MORE so than a Muslim, for whom it might be "forgiveable" since a muslim "doesn't know any better... they have to."

No, I am CHOOSING to cover, and choosing the hardest road of covering completely. This is a great mystery to most people, and a great sign to them of the power of faith in Christ if I remember that they are watching and that I am to be for them a sign of peace with my maker.

The funniest thing I've noticed thus far has been the rednecks who openly gawk. At the doctor's office the other day a woman actually told me "WOW, ma'am, you sure speak English good!" (hah!) and another asked me where I learned to speak it.

And of course, the never-ending choruses of "aren't you HOT under there?" (after all, it's 100 or so here in the south) are entertaining. In case you're wondering... no, I'm NOT hot. I'm actually cooler under all these loose, breathable clothes than I am in a tube top and shorts. True story.

But one of the best effects, and this is the one that honestly keeps me so in love with covering, is the bond of love you feel towards your human sisters who walk the path of headcovering with you, no matter what their motive (religious or illness or otherwise.) One of the most amazing things in the world is the instant connection you have with any other modestly-dressed woman you might encounter-- its' a true sisterhood, and through it love has broken down walls and Christ has been clearly proclaimed.

For many years Wayne and I wanted to be missionaries in distant lands... particularly along Mediterranean, Middle Eastern, and Indian cultures. God has still not granted us this "wish" although it still burns in our hearts. And we are at peace with that, believing in His timing and judgement. But in the strangest manner, He has led us here, in our community, to love Indians, Middle Easterners, and Mediterranean people who just "happen" across our path, over and over again. A pious woman with modest attire, who is not swayed by the world is a true bridge to unity and ministry... through this simple act of covering my hair and body, I am able to make a way into a cultures which are closed to Christianity and to the Christian message of love of God and neighbor. Ultimately, it helps me to know women who go through the same thing, and to see that despite VAST religious differences, underneath it all we are not that different, and that we both want with all our hearts to do good and be good.

Before my husband came to me with a request to cover my head again, I had committed, by discernment, to stopping whatever I was doing and praying for Muslims at each call of the daily muslim prayer times. I downloaded an islamic app to my iphone which acts as an azan clock, and with every call to prayer I get on my knees and recite the prayers the Angel at Fatima told the children to pray in a clear-cut message that Mary was coming for Muslims there as well. Then I pray an act of consecration of the human race to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. And as I have done this consistently, I have found that God has made way for me to connect with more muslim families, who I can pray for, and love on, and serve. He has also helped me to heal from a very real distrust of Muslim people's intentions.... because of my "fundamentalist" attitude in terms of religion, it is easy to see MUSLIMS as the enemy, forgetting that our warfare is with powers and principalities, not PEOPLE.

When my husband asked me to cover in the traditional "hijab" style, and when, in turn, I have then often been mistaken for a Muslim, followers of a religion which is so at odds with Christianity and which is seen as the terrorizing force behind much of the fear we experience in the west today, it has been such a blessing to me to know that God has set this path before each of us, and we have but to say yes as things come up and He paints a beautiful portrait with our lives.

Ironically, the peace I have found in this practice, and in particular as it relates to the missionary call of Christ to love and serve Muslims in our communities, has been the only thing which kept me from going off the deep end when I recently had a big "crisis of faith."
As a protestant, it was so easy: Islam is bad, Christianity is good. End of story. Thus all muslims must become Christians. End of Story.
But what this did was alienate Wayne and I from the very cultures which we felt led to serve.... it created in us an "us vs them" mentality which we could not shake. I will blog more, hopefully tomorrow as I've been meaning to write this for ages, on the change that has been created in our hearts... but for now suffice to say that we have simply learned to truly serve and love the Muslims we encounter, with no strings attached, and this has paved the way for the Gospel of Peace.
Because of this simple, small act: because I cover my head, I was able to find peace where before there had been none, and at at time when the very foundations of my faith were being shaken. I thank God every day for his wisdom.

Finally, I can attest to the glory of the covering for women in Orders. Wearing the covering has been such a fulfillment of the Carmelite Way of Life that I have been called to and is, in an even visible way, a special "clothing" in grace, a grace that overflows from the Brown Scapular of Mount Carmel-- a grace which promises that when we wear the garment, the grace washes over us. Not because we wear it, but because BY wearing it we are reminded and we remind that we choose to lay down our lives for the One who made us. Amen!

An interview with an exorcist

An interview with Fr Gabriele Amorth, Diocesan Exorcist of Rome.
Satanic Alarm

STEFANO M. PACI

"Catholic hierarchy should say a fervent mea culpa. For, it is also their fault if devil worship and esoteric practices are becoming more widespread"

Fr Gabrielle Amorth
Diocesan Exorcist of Rome (1996)



You are in a unique position to form a general opinion of the whole question and you have direct-experience. Is it true that more people today are "associating" with the Devil?

GABRIELE AMORTH: Unfortunately, it is. In these past ten years of exorcisms I have witnessed a progressive increase in the number of people coming to me. Of course, more information circulates today. In the past, a lot of people who might have needed the help of an exorcist wouldn't have known how to go about finding one and may not even have known that they exist. But I think this increase is owing to an explosion proper of maleficence and evil and this is the Devil's work.

What are the causes?

AMORTH: More and more people are practising spiritism or joining Satanic sects. It's like a fashion, almost. Sometimes they just join without thinking about what they might come up against. Then they find themselves facing the consequences in terror. For the Devil is not an impersonal entity. This is not just a name psychoanalysts use for the abstract ills that exist in society. He is a real person and, as Saint Peter says in his first letter, 'like a roaring lion he is on the prowl for someone to devour'. Unfortunately, a poor form of theology has also spread this abstract concept of the Devil within the Catholic Church. Yet this is the exact opposite of Gospel teaching, of the Magisterium and of the feelings of the Christian people. Many bishops don't believe that he exists either. So if more and more people are recurring to esoteric practices and joining Satanic sects it is also because the Church has stopped teaching the proper doctrine about the Devil taught to us by Scripture and transmitted to us by Tradition. So I would say that Catholic hierarchy is also greatly responsible for the spread of this phenomenon.

Who else is to blame?

AMORTH: The press which has paid the worst kind of service by amplifying the phenomenon and nearly always failing to publish proper information. By so doing they are proclaiming and propagating evil. And so today we are seeing vast numbers of people turn to witches, card-readers and Satanic sects and the consequences are alarming even public authorities.

What are the evils and maleficence you mentioned earlier?

AMORTH: There are two types: demonic infestation and demonic possession. Infestation is provoked by a demon 'outside' the person and every now and then it assails the person causing physical and mental disturbances totally immune to medical treatment. Possession, which is very rare, happens 'inside' the person who is penetrated by a demon which sometimes acts using the person's own faculties. I would stress that cases of authentic demonic possession are very rare and cannot be compared with the cases of people in need of psychiatric help, which are 999 out of a thousand. The majority of cases I treat are cases of demonic infestation.

What is the cause of either of these conditions?

AMORTH: There are four causes. Firstly, seances and membership of Satanic sects. These practices, which expose people to maleficence and evils and even possession, are booming today, playing into the Devil's hands. Today, people no longer go to seances conducted by mediums who enter into a trance and claim to conjure up the dead - the truth is that if someone does intervene it is the Devil because the dead are in Paradise, Hell or Purgatory. They put questions to a 'spirit' and received the answers by placing a glass in a circle made of letters of the alphabet, or else they leave a tape recorder on in an empty room to record messages. Some thoughtless priests have been known to suggest this particular practice to parents who have lost children so that they can enter into contact with them. In short, seances are 'played' as if they were a game. According to one reliable survey, 36 per cent of schoolchildren have held seances of this type.

What else is behind the phenomenon?

AMORTH: The second cause is that some forms of grave sins are being persistently committed and so they become more rooted. The third cause is Evil itself. 'Evil' is a general word meaning something bad done to another person through the Devil. The victim is innocent but God allows it because he respects man's freedom. Just as someone might pay to have another person killed, people go to witches in association with Satan to have something evil done against another person. Evil can be done in various ways - the evil eye, curses or by Macumba or Voodoo rites. These rites, in my experience, are the hardest to combat. But if the person to whom the evil is done lives in the grace of God, if he is 'armed' by a normal life of prayer and communion with the Lord, the evil rarely sticks or else it sticks in a weaker form. The fourth cause is an assault by the Devil himself which, in defiance of human explanation, makes a person a victim of maleficent evil. And God allows this. In the Bible and history of the Church there are many such cases - Job, Saint Angela da Foligno, the Cure of Ars. More recent cases include the Blessed John Calabria and Saint John Bosco who was tormented with the Devil's afflictions for two years. Saint Paul, too, tells us that he was tormented by a messenger of Satan. It clearly transpires from his Letters that he was suffering from a physical ill of maleficent origin and it stayed with him until he died. He writes: 'So that I should not get above myself, I was given a thorn in the flesh, a messenger from Satan to batter me'.

What is an exorcism?

AMORTH: It is a 'sacramental'. Canon 1166 of the Code of Canon Law defines sacramentals as sacred signs by which, in imitation of the sacraments, come the principally spiritual effects obtained by the supplication of the Church. Whereas the sacraments were instituted by Jesus Christ and are the same gestures as Jesus Christ performed, the sacramentals are proposed by the Church. The Church instituted the sacramental of exorcism to make the power, conferred by Christ to all believers, more effective. In fact, every believer or community can offer prayers of deliverance following the example of Christ's teaching reported in the 16th chapter of the Gospel of Mark: 'Whoever believes,.. in my name will cast out devils.' But only bishops and priests - never the laity - who have received an express license from a bishop may perform an exorcism. This is established by Canon 1167 of the Code stating that exorcisms must be performed in strict observance of the rites and formulas approved by the Church.

Was this rite also reformed after the Second Vatican Council?

AMORTH: You must be joking. It is the only text of all the texts due to be published after the last Council that has still to come out, even though 30 years have passed since Vatican II closed. The book of exorcisms currently in use is still the Roman Rite version dated 1614. This is another sign of the remarkable disinterest within the Catholic Church towards the Devil's concrete actions. In contrast to the Orthodox Church and to many Protestant confessions, the Catholic Church has almost abandoned the use of exorcisms, retaining this practice to be a throwback to the 'dark ages.' Catholic hierarchy must say a fervent mea culpa for it is also their fault if esoteric practices and Satanic sects are more widespread. All too often, the Church has been guilty of omission in its teaching on the Devil and in providing remedies for the faithful under attack by him. The Congregation of Divine Worship once formed an ad hoc commission to draft the new rite for exorcisms. But the temporary rite they recently drafted reflects a total lack of preparation on the part of the commission's members. They were liturgists who had never performed or seen exorcisms and who hadn't the slightest idea how they took place. We protested and the new rite has now been shelved [see 2002 POSTSCRIPT below - Ed.]. It's better for us to keep to the Roman Rite of over three centuries ago.

Has the Italian Episcopal Conference improved matters by appointing exorcists to the various dioceses, as the press often reports?

AMORTH: When they intervene in this field, bishops often say the wrong things. This is seriously counter-productive. It all depends on the awareness and goodwill of local bishops. Some bishops realize that they have more need today of exorcists on hand in their dioceses and so they appoint them. This is also a reflection of growing express demand from faithful with the increase in witches, card-readers, Satanic sects and spiritists. Some bishops are excessive. Tarcisio Carboni, Bishop of Macerata, was killed in a car accident recently on his way to the Italian Church convention in Palermo. He had just appointed 22 exorcists all in one go. Other dioceses have none at all, their bishops refusing to appoint any.

Acknowledgements to 30 Days



POSTSCRIPT

February 2002

Blunting the Sword of Exorcism

AS Harry Potter trivialises the occult on the outside, Father Gabriele Amorth, Founder and Honorary President of the International Association of Exorcists, complains of Vatican efforts to stymie the power of exorcists on the inside. In a recent interview published in the Italian monthly 30 Days [No. 6, 2001], he spoke out about the new rite of exorcism being developed by the Congregation of Divine Worship:

"All of us exorcists in trying out the prayers of the new ad interim Rite have proved that they are totally ineffective. But then again, the rite of baptism of children came off worse too. It was totally re-worked so that exorcism against Satan has been all but eliminated... Their intention was to arm us with a blunt sword. Some effective prayers were cancelled, prayers with 12 centuries of history. New ineffective prayers were written in."

His only lifeline, he explained, was that permission can still be obtained to use the traditional rite. He further bitterly complained that 150 trained and canonically appointed exorcists were "barred from taking part in a public Papal Audience in Saint Peter's Square. (This) says much of how the exorcists of the Church are obstructed in their ministry, how much they are frowned upon by so many of the ecclesiastical authorities."

Asked: "You are locked in daily battle with the Devil. What do you see as Satan's greatest success?" the highly respected cleric replied:

"The fact that he has managed to convince people that he does not exist. He has almost managed it, even within the Church. We have a clergy and an Episcopate who no longer believe in the Devil, in exorcism, in the exceptional evil the Devil can instill, or even the power that Jesus bestowed to cast out demons."

Commenting on the above exclusion of the 150 exorcists, he added:

"The smoke of Satan gets in everywhere, everywhere. Perhaps we were kept out of the Papal audience because they were afraid that all those exorcists might have cast out the legions of demons that have installed themselves in the Vatican."

"You're joking aren't you?" returned the startled interviewer, to which Father Amorth replied:

"It might sound like it, but I don't think that it is a joke. I have no doubt whatever the Devil is tempting the upper levels of the Church, above all, just as he tempts every upper level."

* * * * *

From the Catechism of the Catholic Church

2851. Evil is not an abstraction, but refers to a person, Satan, the Evil One, the angel who opposes God. The devil (dia-bolos) is the one who 'throws himself across' God's plan and his work of salvation accomplished in Christ.

1673. When the Church asks publicly and authoritatively in the name of Jesus Christ that a person or object be protected against the power of the Evil One and withdrawn from his dominion, it is called exorcism. Jesus performed exorcisms (Mark 1: 25) and from him the Church has received the power and office of exorcising. In a simple form, exorcism is performed at the celebration of Baptism. The solemn exorcism, called 'a major exorcism', can be performed only by a priest and with the permission of the bishop. The priest must proceed with prudence, strictly observing the rules established by the Church. Exorcism is directed at the expulsion of demons or the liberation from demonic possession through the spiritual authority which Jesus entrusted to his Church. Illness, especially psychological illness, is a very different matter; treating this is the concern of medical science. Therefore, before an exorcism is performed, it is important to ascertain that one is dealing with the presence of the Evil One, and not an illness.

2116. All forms of divination are to be rejected: recourse to Satan or demons, conjuring up the dead or other practices falsely supposed to 'unveil' the future. Consulting horoscopes, astrology, palm reading, interpretation of omens and lots, the phenomena of clairvoyance, and recourse to mediums all conceal a desire for power over time, history and, in the last analysis, other human beings, as well as a wish to conciliate hidden powers. They contradict the honour, respect and loving fear that we owe to God alone.

2117. All practices of magic or sorcery by which one attempts to tame occult powers, so as to place them at one's service and have a supernatural power over others - even if this were for the sake of restoring their health are gravely contrary to the virtue of religion. These practices are even more to be condemned when accompanied by the intention of harming someone, or when they have recourse to the intervention of demons. Wearing charms is also reprehensible. Spiritism often implies divination or magic practices: the Church for her part warns the faithful against it.


From the June/July 1996 feature in Christian Order Magazine, found here:
http://www.christianorder.com/features/features_1996/features_june-july96_2.html

On the role of families in the Spiritual Struggle

"The history of mankind, the history of salvation, passes by way of the family. The family is placed at the center of the great struggle between good and evil, between life and death, between love and all that is opposed to love.
To the family is entrusted the task of striving, first and foremost, to unleash the forces of good, the source of which is found in Christ the Redeemer of man. Every family unit needs to make these forces their own so that, to use a phrase spoken on the occasion of the Millennium of Christianity in Poland, the family will be 'strong with the strength of God'."

-Pope John Paul II

A cloth diapering primer

A dear friend who is expecting her first wrote and asked me to give her some idea of the usability of Cloth Diapers, especially for babies with sensitive skin (my little whitey kids definitely have sensitive skin! Haha.)

I am a HUGE supporter of cloth diapering. Not being particularly interested in the environmental reasons for CDing (although I think it's a nice added benefit that they are environmentally responsible) I look at them as a really beneficial for parents and children, particularly because they force us to "give" of ourselves just a little bit more, which is a healthy by-product of parenting that-- if taken the right way-- will grow parents into better people. Among other things, kids who are CDed tend to be potty trained earlier (YAY!) and tend to be changed more (YAY!) than non-Cloth diapered kids.

Let's look at the cost first. Cloth diapers are expensive, that's for sure. But I can tell you that we once did the math and determined that we would save around $3000 per kid if we exclusively cloth diapered. Amazing! That's like, a whole vacation. Of course, in our family that $3000 turned into about $2000 because we part time cloth diaper, part time disposable diaper. But even so.... we were able to get the kids some clothes, participate in events we normally couldn't have, etc. So yay!

Secondly, let's look at their practicality. In our house, we designate one area of a closet the Diaper closet. We finish laundering them and stack them: shells, liners, wipes, and extra inserts. I keep a box of pre-stuffed diapers for daytime use on the first shelf and keep refilling it. That way if I'm in a hurry, I don't have to do any work, they are just ready to go. When I finish laundering them, I just make a quick pile and I'm ready to go. The older kids actually do the piling for me! It's not as quick and easy as disposable diapering, I'll be honest. But it's a good kind of work- and it helps the kids learn to participate in the household chores etc. And it really isn't THAT much more work. For us, the amount of money we save makes it worth it.

I used cloth wipes for a while too, but it turns out that in our house, wet paper wipes are easier. Of course, that's because I didn't have enough money to buy a LOT of wipes, and I found that I was using too many. If I had the cash to get the cloth wipes, I would do that too and it was easy enough. You just need a lot of them.

You can even make your own wipe lotion:
1/4 c. baby wash

1/4 c. baby oil

1/4 c. baby lotion

Two c. hot tap water
in an airtight container or spray bottle.

OK, onto styles and types. There are literally dozens of styles of CDs available out there, so I'm not going to waste my time writing about ones that don't work for us. We found that AIOs and Pocket diapers were the most useful, and now almost exclusively use Pocket Diapers. This is a diaper that has an external "shell" and an insert that fits into a pocket. You can stuff them extra for naps and if you choose to use them for nighttime.

They look something like this:



Of all the brands that exist out there, I can't say that one is definitely better than the other. They mostly look the same and seem to do the same types of things. We use a brand called bumgenius because they are the most popular, thus we are able to find them discounted etc. But we also have a variety of other types we use, some of which were homemade and others of which store bought. We also like a brand called Happy Heineez. And one which I can no longer find called Jamtotz.

We recommend getting a one size diaper as opposed to fitted diapers because kids grow so fast that the expense just doesn't make sense. I have a closet full of one size diapers, some of which I inherited and others of which I bought. They have gone through at least three kids and are holding up GREAT! They may not be as "shiny and new" looking as they once were, but they certainly look clean and function well. The only thing I've had to replace has been the inserts that had already been through three + babies. Not a big deal!


How we do it:

When it's time to diaper a kid, we stuff an insert (or two, if it's naptime or we're going for a long drive :P) into the pocket and snap it on.
A note on sizing: One sizes usually work on kids 3 months and older. Before then, the kids tend to be too small for them to be not BULKY, although I HAVE successfully diapered a newborn in cloth diaps using small size diapers and thinner inserts. Needless to say, if you want to CD the easy, minimal-thinking-and-spending way, just plan on using disposables til the kid hits 3 mos. Fold up the used diaper and stick it in a diaper pail or diaper bag. At the end of the day or two, unfold them all, spray them down (I do this in the sink using the nozzle, but you can do it in toilet using an awesome attachment that connects to your toilet tank that you can buy from cottonbabies.com)

We wash them in hot water with detergent that is made for sensitive skin first, then again in cold water. Then you can hang them out to dry (that's best for absorbency) or run them through your dryer on medium/low heat. That's it!
Because my kids have sensitive skin, we don't use regular detergent and we don't use fabric softener. After about four/five months of daily use, they start to smell-- not BAD-- but not totally "fresh." So you run them through with a bit of baking soda and they are good as new.
In order to protect their sensitive skin, I also change them frequently (never letting three hours go by without a change) and make sure they are getting lots of "air time." :P
I don't use diaper cream because it can affect the absorbency of the diapers. But I haven't needed to unless I forgot to change someone for a while. :P

ACTUAL washing instructions usually look something like this:
When you first get your diapers,you should wash the diapers before wearing.Wash both the diapers and insert after each use.When wet,separate insert and cover and store in a dry diaper pail.Do not soak.If soiled,simply knock solids into toilet.Small solids stuck to the inner layer will dissolve in the wash.Use a mini-shower toilet attachment to rinse off soiled diapers over the toilet (optional).First, run a cold rinse or soak cycle with no detergent.Second,run a hot cycle with detergent lower than 40C.Do not use bleach.Third,if your hot wash is not automatically followed by a cold rinse,run a cold rinse cycle.This step only necessary with a particularly dirty load.Tumble dry the diapers in dryer on low or hang to dry.Never dry on high heat.

Now, at night, it has been my personal experience that the diapers leak. No matter what I do, despite all the info out there that cloths don't leak. Because I didn't have enough money to buy wool soakers (which are a type of wool pants you can make or buy to put over the kid that wicks the wetness away from them and absorbs it so that the bed doesn't wet either) I decided long ago to disposable diap at night. And that works GREAT for our family. It also helps to make sure I don't give fluids right at bedtime, of course.

A long time ago, a dear friend sent me a box of her used diapers to try. I was hooked from then on, and can say that it gets kind of addicting-- wierdly enough those of us who cloth diaper become so into cloth diapering that we get kind of crazy about it. I even use cloth menstrual pads when I'm actually menstruating (haha-- I have been pregnant or nursing for the better part of the last five years. :P) I recommend asking someone if they have a couple cloth diapers you can borrow to try it out. If you like it, go for it! If not, you didn't lose a thing. YES, they seem really expensive, but I have to tell you--- disposables are insanely expensive, and all you do is throw them away. I have successfully used the same cloth diapers for ALL my kids. Because I have irish triplets, my kids are in diapers at the same time, so they just borrow each other's. It's awesome that I don't have to worry about making sure I am using the right sizes... for moms with more than one kid in diapers this is a godsend!

One more note- on daycare situations. Most non-mom people really don't like using cloth diapers. So if you are going to use them, make sure you get at least SOME pocket diapers and prestuff them for the person, so that the experience is somewhat similar to disposable diapering for them. usually if you show them, they will get onboard.
Get an additional small waterproof diaper laundering bag so you can stick dirty diapers in your diaper bag without stinking the thing up.
With my girls... this was great. BUT my son is a notorious "wet pooper" (he rarely makes solid poops) so when I'm on the go with him I use disposables because I don't have the ability to rinse his diapers off and I can't just dump the poop in the toilet.
If your child is the same way, you may find that you use disposables more than cloth for that reason.

That's it! If you're a new mom and reading this, the idea of poop types might be overwhelming and turn you off of cloth diapering, but I will say this: You're a mom. You're going to get poop on your hands. Heck, some days you will actually be telling your kids not to touch or -- gasp-- even EAT poop. So get used to it now. It's not going to happen all the time, but when it does, it's going to be fine. And if you cloth diaper, you will find that you don't have to deal with stinky diapers hanging around your trash can and that it's so much fun that diapering will be less of a drudgery and more of a game. So try it-- even if you think you probably won't like it.
It's good for baby, it's good for the environment, it's good for your finances, it's good for your parenting. What have you got to lose?

If you have any questions at all, feel free to comment.