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| Our first Shabbat of the Advent season. |
Last night was my annual "Thankful for Advent" party. This was the first year I have had a co-host and it was such an enjoyable experience. My dear friend Cherry and I have been in dialogue with God and each other all year over the same issues... namely discipleship, and our theme for this year was "Discipleship in the Family." Our hope was that, taking the Holy Family as their model, our guests would go home and look at advent in a new light- as an opportunity to create structured moments of prayer and traditions that lead to right living and discipleship in the midst of those closest to them. That what they started at Advent would stick all year long.
When Cherry gets a chance to type up the things she discussed, I will post them up here because they were so insightful! I love the joy she brings to everything. Before the party, my husband dropped me off at her home much earlier than she and I had planned. Because of that, I was present while her family had dinner and put up their first Jesse Tree ornament. Though I was nursing the baby in the next room while they ate to give them some privacy, I was so encouraged by the sweet sounds of a family doing just that--- parents teaching their children and training them up to live for the Lord. It was a beautiful blessing to me!
Another thing that greatly encouraged me was the topic. I got to share how one family made such an impact on me and reflect on how to impact my own family in the same way. And I got to use that family's own thoughts and blogs to do it. It was amazing!
So without further ado..... Here are the notes for Thankful for Advent 2012! PLEASE join us next year if you missed this year.
ADVENT IS: -HOPEFUL EXPECTATION-
Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your faithful and kindle in them the fire of your love. Send forth your Spirit and they shall be created. And You shall renew the face of the earth.
O, God, who by the light of the Holy Spirit, did instruct the hearts of the faithful, grant that by the same Holy Spirit we may be truly wise and ever enjoy His consolations, Through Christ Our Lord, Amen.
1. Advent is waiting. But what are we waiting for?
JESUS to be birthed into the world.
We make a parallel between that and making a home for Him in our hearts.
2. How can we prepare ourselves to meet Him?
+ become holier
+ become more aware of Him
+ become more LIKE Him
_____________________
= PRAY, because we cannot do it alone. We need HIS Help, and He has sent us the Holy Spirit to do just that.
= STUDY, because we need to know how to pray and what to do
= ACT, because God will not move if we do not step out in faith and ACT. In fact, He says in the Word that faith without works is dead.
--Let’s look at those whose hearts WERE prepared to meet Him in the Bible for a minute: The Jews.
--During Advent, we study OT connections that prepare us for the coming of the Messiah
-- traditions like the Jesse Tree and the O Antiphons walk us through salvation history.
(see resource table)
-- I Encourage you to do that year-round as a faith builder
-- Start a havurah or small group if you aren't already in one, where you can study and pray alongside people who share a desire to KNOW God more. This will help motivate you as you learn alongside your family members. Maybe even get several families together!
(see resource table)
-- A Jewish rhythm of life is centered around the liturgical and life cycle.
-- This is the Catholic way and always has been, but the Catholic year centers on the fulfillment of the feasts in Christ.
-- Protestants are observing both more and more.
The Holy Spirit is doing this work to remind people that time is going somewhere… that all this ends one day. Advent is the greater part of a whole….Christmas is not the whole story, we have Easter too.
As Fr. Barron pointed out in the video—waiting is half of it, and ACTING is the other- stepping out in faith. Responding to the tasks He gives us. What tasks do we have?
To start, Jesus himself has given us a GREAT COMMISSION. Let’s read it:
MT 28: 16-20.
16 Then the eleven disciples went away into Galilee, to the mountain which Jesus had appointed for them. 17 When they saw Him, they worshiped Him; but some doubted. 18 And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.
So, God calls us to MAKE DISCIPLES, not just EVANGELIZE.
1. According to Scott Hahn’s Catholic Bible Dictionary, a disciple is a student or follower who emulates the example set by a master and seeks to identify with the master’s teachings.
(We can see, of course, that EVERYBODY is learning from someone from our kids responses to our teachings, even when we forget they are watching. Mt 10:24-25)
2. In a Jewish context (the culture of the students of Torah) a Rabbi means a “learned teacher.” A disciple means “his loving student.”
3. In fact, in the OT, the disciples followed the PROPHETS. (Is 8:16)
4. In the NT, John the Baptist had disciples (Mt 14:12, Jn 1:35, 3:25) as did the Pharisees (Mt 22:16, Mk 2:18, Lk 5:33) who called THEMSELVES disciples of Moses (Jn 9:28). There is a culture of discipleship that permeates the Bible. In the NT it most commonly means “a follower of Jesus Christ.”
BUT it can mean ANY follower. (acts 6:1, 9:1, 19, 13:52)
5. More specifically in the NT, it refers to one of the 12 apostles. (Mt 10:2, 28:16-20, Mk 16:14-18, Lk 24:47-49) There are over 250 references to DISCIPLE in the NT, most of which are found in the Gospels and in the book of ACTS.
Being a disciple of Jesus = radically different than any other experience of discipleship known to the Jews at that time. Why?
FIRST-- Most rabbis had followed the course of instruction of another rabbi. Jesus was no ordinary rabbi, because HE HAD NOT!
SECOND-- Rabbis sought permission to teach from Jewish authorities. Jesus did NOT seek it and did not need it! (Mt 13:54, John 7:15)
So: Jesus’ teaching was unprecedented.
(Mt 7:29, Mk 1:22)
ALSO-- His closest disciples did not come to Him for instruction. Instead, they were each PERSONALLY called by Him to a life of discipleship by His own authority!
(Mt. 4:18-22, Mk 1:16-20) (CCC 767, 787)
THIS discipleship was not merely a matter of listening to the teachings and learning wisdom. It was a commitment to a new way of life-- one modeled by Jesus!!
The Characteristics of this new discipleship were twofold:
FIRST- The disciples had to be willing to “take up their cross and follow Jesus.” (Mt 16:24, Mk 8:34, Lk 14:27)
SECOND- The disciples must be willing to LEAVE EVERYTHING BEHIND (family, friends, posessions) and share in His mission, joy, suffering, and even death for the sake of Jesus.
(Mt 8:19, 10:37, Lk 9:57, 14:26)
If you are a person who has ever gotten serious enough about God, I guarantee you have experienced both of these things.
--Carried your own cross
-- Left things/people behind.
If you have not, I encourage you to ask yourself WHY you haven’t yet? These are signs of our discipleship.
So there are FORMAL applications of discipleship, and there is a place and a time for those, as we have seen, and then there is the radically different experience of being a disciple of JESUS.
We have seen that we must PERSONALLY be discipled by JESUS, and that WE are called to represent Jesus to the world. We are called to BE discipled and TO disciple.
There are two aspects of human life that enable this process: family and community.
God willing, next year we will cover advent discipleship in the community. Today, we are focused on family. This might sound selfish, to start with ourselves, but families are in fact the building blocks of society.
--Consider that God Himself is a family.
Scott Hahn says:
"Earthly households reflect this in various ways but always imperfectly. “The life of the trinity is the central mystery of the Christian faith and life,” says the Catechism in 234. It is the source of all other mysteries of faith, and the light that enlightens them."
I have a personal story of how it enlightened me. Many years ago on Christmas Eve, God saved me by sending me a revelation of His Son. I wasn't looking for anything at the time and it wasn't something I was actively seeking out, but like his own disciples God called me to follow Him despite the fact that I was going along in life thinking everything was fine. Little did I know that everything was NOT fine and that the path I was on lead to death. When I realized that, it was like a lightbulb went off in my head and I knew that God had called me personally out of the crowd and asked me to give myself to Him in love. Of course, I had no choice but to say: "yes," but my next question was: "how??"
The event that occurred that Christmas eve was clearly one of a supernatural nature. By a series of completely "random" events, I found myself in the middle of a nondenominational church service even though I had never been to one in my life. By contrast I had been going to Sunday mass and even daily mass, praying the rosary, and observing the Christian life all of my life.I often ask myself why that lightbulb never went off in mass, or during a Catholic retreat. It took me singing the words to a song: "I surrender all," and realizing I didn't mean them. It took an incredible series of events in which people I had never met to my right and to my left and behind me and in front of me, by a power I could not explain outside of "God," began speaking things to me which they could not possibly know-- speaking to me of my innermost hopes, my fears, my dreams. Speaking healing into places no one had ever seen. I came alive that night and I've never been the same since.
So now I knew, without a doubt, that Jesus was real. But next I needed to answer the question: "How now shall I live?"
And the answer to that seemed to be part of the Great Conversation I had had all my life. I was a Catholic-- I needed to go to mass. I needed to go to confession. I needed to pray the rosary. These things seemed obvious to me, and I did them with increasing zeal, but I was literally starving for more. I wanted to know how that internal change could reflect itself in my everyday actions. I often acted one way, and DESIRED to act another way. I was stuck.
Enter a family--- a family many of you have met or heard me talk about-- who was able to answer those questions.
At first, I just attended a bible study for young people in their home. Led by the father, a successful local businessman, I began at this Bible study to learn to do simple things like read my Bible every day, repent when I sinned (I can still see him standing up and giving us a visual image of a sinner-- an archer who had missed the mark) and ask for the baptism in the Holy Spirit. His wife was there serving us and listening to him with great respect, which made an impression on me. Though I had almost never heard her say a word, which was unheard of where I come from, her sweet presence and thoughtful, compassionate demeanor gave her a strength that very few women I had ever met have shared.
Eventually I began to pick up more details about righteous living. I learned to close my mouth instead of open it (I'm still working on that one) when I was going to say something unwise. I learned to fast and to wage spiritual warfare. I learned to look for spiritual gifts and put them to use.
And as I did, I learned the things that this family had learned from other families who had sown into their lives. Over time, I was introduced to this man's daughter, and she -- thank God-- saw through the mess I was and shared her life with me to help me see that God had plans for me. We developed a relationship and she became one of my most treasured friends. To this day, I often want to call and ask her: "what do you think I should about.....(insert random difficult situation here.)"
To her credit, I am always reminded that she would tell me: "well, what does your husband think?" Such a friend is a priceless treasure.
-- I still in my daily life retain their teachings and I still pass them on to my own children and the people I find myself in discipleship or counseling situations with. How many of you have heard of Elisabeth Elliot, Derek Prince or Charles Simpson because of me? How many of you have heard me mention Liza or her father? I am certain that every person in this room whom I have met have heard these names from me because I have shared again and again how their faithfulness to teach what they themselves had learned had changed my life. But more importantly, how many of you have heard me mention JESUS? If today I can speak to you of our Lord with love and tenderness, it is because long ago these people were faithful to speak to me of God's love and of their journey with Him. These people have become a part of me, and a part of the children I am raising. Through them I have learned to know God myself, and become an active part of Christ's mystical body. So are my children! What a beautiful thing one family can do.
So what exactly did this family do that was so different from what I had experienced in the past?
-- They never once tried to mold me so that I would conform to THEM, but rather to CHRIST in my own circumstances and with my own specific gifts. They asked the Holy Spirit for wisdom in counseling me, and they were receptive to what God told them, even when it meant that I was to do things differently than they had.
-- They were also willing to love me through some serious sin in my life. Because they so clearly mirrored God to me, I often hid from them the truth about what I was doing or thinking because I was afraid they would see me in my sinfulness and not like me! But instead, because they were people of prayer, they seemed to always know my sin even before I realized it WAS sin, and to love me anyways despite it-- gently guiding me towards right living. Even today, years later, when I am struggling in a parenting decision, Liza has reminded me that it is GOD'S KINDESS that leads us to repentance. (Romans 2:4)
--They took their role in discipleship more seriously than any other job they had. First towards each other and then towards the rest of us. This is a biblical pattern I believe is necessary to follow.
-- So that’s the story of how A FAMILY modeled after the HOLY FAMILY turned me towards Jesus and taught me how to live for Him by being disciples themselves.
-- Later on, I reflected about the role of my family in discipleship towards me. My family had always taken me to church each week, made sure I knew how to say certain prayers, that I received the sacraments and that I lived by the liturgical year. But there was NO discipleship in my home, because there was no desire to pass on a personal relationship or personal revelation, or to ensure that I was interacting with a LIVING God. People prayed behind closed doors and did not talk about Jesus as if He were a real part of their lives, but more as if He were a distant and mysterious God. They turned to him in trouble, but rarely in good times. And even then, He was distant, not present among us. It's ironic, looking back, because I was RECEIVING Jesus Christ in the Eucharist at the time--- closer than my breath. But somehow I had boarded a sinking ship... and yet He called me.
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| Here I am enjoying a Cajun breakfast with Liza years ago |
In the past at these parties we have talked a great deal about the traditions of advent, and I suspect that’s why many of you are here. Every year, people come because they want to learn new traditions to use during advent!
Those traditions, which we are all becoming more familiar with, are an essential part of the “great preparation.” They help to form hearts and minds and speak a tactile language to the people in our lives. They help us to form a community, and a Church, and they cause us to quiet ourselves and HEAR God.
Tonight, though, we are going to focus on a different aspect: that of DISCIPLESHIP in the home, which happens when the reasons behind those traditions become like little lightbulbs over our children’s heads.
Next year, God willing, we will discuss discipleship in the COMMUNITY, but today we are going to look at the example of the Holy Family—of Mary, Joseph, and Jesus.
-A note of caution: Be careful not let the personal aspect of discipleship in the family deter you from the traditional aspect. There must be a healthy uniting of these two things: tradition and personal revelation-- within the family in order for the family to thrive, just as we need this in the greater context of the Church. Protestants might be uncomfortable with using the word tradition just as they are with using the word "religion." But the reality is that in tradition there is structure, and in structure-- there is peace.
- These traditions are what transform culture from mundane to HOLY. There is a tendency in some people to reject tradition because people are afraid that it stifles the Holy Spirit. This could not be further from the truth--- in fact, they enable us to quiet OURSELVES, submit to one another, and hear God. Of course, it is possible to MISS the actions of the Holy Spirit because one is so focused on a tradition, and that would be a shame. Ideally, these two aspects are interwoven in a beautiful tapestry of grace.
-- We, the Church, are called and set apart. Like Israel, we are called to live in community, and God came at Christmas to dwell among us to demonstrate that fact. There is nothing “individual” about the Christian life… our sin affects all others just as our peace affects all others. These very traditions which we are building into our lives or which we grew up on are there to bond us one to another in faith, hope, and love. Just as Jews the world over feel a kinship as they light the sabbath lights, so we too as Christians recognize our brothers and sisters in the actions of advent preparation in the home.
-- It was the traditions of the Jewish people that enabled them to SEE and RECOGNIZE Jesus when He came, and of his disciples to SEE and SHARE him after He had gone again. It speaks the language of salvation to all those whom God is calling.
- The story of advent is the story of how ONE family welcomed a child and changed the world.
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INDIVIDUAL OR GROUP ACTIVITY
Advent is separated into FOUR weeks, and each of the weeks has a theme.
FIRST WEEK OF ADVENT: HOPE
THE KEY TO HOPE IS FAITH
Romans 8:24-25 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
-- Hope is brought to our family through regular prayer and the establishment of a relationship with God.
-- Hope is an attitude of the heart.
-- Hope is built out of our faith. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God.
1. READ LIZA'S BLOG ENTRY: “WHAT MY FATHER SAYS ABOUT BEING SPIRITUAL” This is about the need for structure AND personal revelation and how they work together to build FAITH.
2. DISCUSS: WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO BUILD YOUR OWN FAITH? YOUR FAMILY’S FAITH? CAN YOU INCREASE THE AMOUNT OF TIME YOU SPEND PRAYING? PRAY TOGETHER?
HOW CAN THE TRADITIONS OF ADVENT POINT YOU TOWARDS PRAYER?
BRAINSTORM, and PREPARE an answer to this question:
“THIS FIRST WEEK OF ADVENT, WHEN THE FOCUS IS ON HOPE, I CAN DO THESE THINGS TO DISCIPLE MY FAMILY IN HOPE….”
SECOND WEEK OF ADVENT: PEACE
THE KEY TO PEACE IS GRACE
Matthew 5:9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
-- God desires for our families to be places of peace (A shalom bayit or “house of peace” in the Jewish tradition.)
--God sent His Son so that we may HAVE peace. He sent the Holy Spirit to enable us to LIVE this peace of heaven in the midst of the storm.
1. READ “What my father says about finding Grace for your journey.”
2. DISCUSS: WHAT IS OUR RESPONSE WHEN OUR HOMES ARE NOT PLACES OF PEACE, BUT PLACES OF CHAOS? WHEN DOES THIS MOST FREQUENTLY OCCUR? WHAT IS THE SOURCE OF OUR TENSIONS AS FAMILIES? WHAT CAN WE DO TO BRING GOD’S PEACE TO OUR EVERYDAY STRESSFUL SITUATIONS? DID THIS ARTICLE HELP YOU TO SEE THAT FAITH IS A JOURNEY?
BRAINSTORM and PREPARE an answer to this question:
“THIS SECOND WEEK OF ADVENT, WHEN THE FOCUS IS ON PEACE, I CAN DO THESE THINGS TO DISCIPLE MY FAMILY IN PEACE…”
THIRD WEEK OF ADVENT(Gaudete—“rejoicing”—Sunday): JOY
THE KEY TO JOY IS OUR NEW NATURE!
Isaiah 12:6 “… Shout, and sing for joy, O inhabitant of Zion, for great in your midst is the Holy One of Israel.”
-- Joy is the representation to others of our faith in Christ. We are to be marked by Joy.
-- We are called to even SUFFER joyfully!
1. READ “What my father says about The New Nature.”
2. DISCUSS: WHEN IS IT HARDEST TO FEEL AND REFLECT JOY IN FAMILY LIFE? HOW MUCH DO OUR CHILDREN REFLECT OUR LACK OF JOY IN THESE AREAS? WHAT CAN WE DO TO CHANGE THAT? WHO WAS THE MOST JOYFUL SUFFERER YOU HAVE EVER MET AND HOW DID THEY AFFECT YOU?
BRAINSTORM and then PREPARE and answer to this question:
“THIS THIRD WEEK OF ADVENT, WHEN THE FOCUS IS ON JOY, I CAN DO THESE THINGS TO DISCIPLE MY FAMILY IN JOY…”
FOURTH WEEK OF ADVENT: LOVE
THE KEY TO LOVE IS SELF-SACRIFICE AND PATIENT ENDURANCE THROUGH TRIALS
1 John 4:7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.
- We are a people of Love, as seen on Christmas day when we celebrate Love come down to earth to be among us.
- Love is best expressed in a family through the marital relationship and the openness of the couple to new life (children.)
1. Read “What my father says about marriage.”
2. DISCUSS: WHAT TYPES OF TRIALS DO MANY MARRIAGES NOT OVERCOME? WHAT SAFEGUARDS CAN WE PUT IN PLACE TO ENSURE THAT OUR MARRIAGES REFLECT GOD’S LOVE? WHAT DO OUR CHILDREN LEARN ABOUT LOVE FROM OBSERVING MARRIAGE IN ACTION?
BRAINSTORM AND THEN PREPARE FOR US THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION:
“THIS FOURTH WEEK OF ADVENT, WHEN THE FOCUS IS ON LOVE, I CAN DO THESE THINGS TO DISCIPLE MY FAMILY IN LOVE…”
Close with Prayer:
We praise You God, for You are Holy and there is none like You.
We confess that we have been so busy looking outwards that we have failed to see the discipleship in our families that you have called us to. We confess pride and bitterness towards our family members and stubbornness that keeps us from loving them as You do.
We thank you for the pattern of discipleship in the Bible and the Church who has preserved this pattern in her traditions. We thank you for those individuals and families who have sacrificed so that You might be glorified in them.
And we ask that You would be with each woman here as they evaluate how to answer your call to disciple her family this Advent. We pray for an increase in Faith during this whole Year of Faith so that she might be aware of Your Presence and Your Will for her family.
1. Remember that it was JESUS who called his disciples and not the other way around. I encourage you to look for opportunities to disciple people in your family EVEN WHEN THEY HAVE NOT ASKED.
2. For some of you, starting a new tradition in your home, especially a prayerful one, is a daunting task. Don’t give up. Remember that faith is a journey!!
3. Please let Cherry or myself know if you need prayer or a little extra help in this area.
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