I heard something on the radio this morning on my way to the doctor's which totally made me think about the whole AP vs Ezzo parenting thing.
In fact, it all tied into a sermon I heard on Sunday too, where the pastor made a claim that if you were born BEFORE the baby boomer era, you were born into a world where people "did right" because it "was right." That is to say that their feelings about doing the right thing, their emotional world, wasn't really validated. They knew that emotions could mislead you, and that it sometimes took some backbone and a little personal pain (sometimes a lot) to do the right thing, but that it was worth it because it was right.
POST baby boomers were raised in the "I'm OK, You're OK," mentality...believing that how they felt about things was relevant to whether or not they should do it, despite the fact that those very things may not be "right." It was a time when absolutes got blurred and everybody's reality became "acceptable" to a certain degree.
Fast forward to this morning's radio show, which challenged Christians not to build their identities as parents on their kids' perceived achievements.... that is to say, these days a "good kid" is a kid who gets straight As, is captain of the cheer squad and plays a mean accordion.... but wait! What about the kid's character? What about their morality or their kindness? These are the things on which we should be basing our children's successes... not the things of this world. And I TOTALLY agree.
Anyways, food for thought.
In other news, I went to the doc's today. My doctor is hilarious. He's a Presbytarian and super young and nice.... he's always warning me that I'm going to go into labor when I'm too "in the Spirit like you Charismatics do... I see it all the time." It makes me laugh to think of the number of times I've been at church worshipping the Lord with all my strength and I go.... "uh oh! Is this it??" Haha. He's totally right. So for all of you trying to bring on early labor--- get you a good sized Charismatic church and worship the Lord and let the Holy Spirit use you for a while. :P
Anyways, I'm no more dilated than I was last week, but I am pretty effaced, which means.... dun dun dun..... time is short.
I'm pretty excited. last night Wayne and I played classical music for the baby and then entertained him by shining a flashlight into my belly. He squirmed and kicked and seemed to thoroughly enjoy it. We can't wait to meet little Ishod.
I can't believe how fast this pregnancy has gone, but then again, I can't tell you how ready I am to move on to the next stage of life.
For those of you who are interested, we are having a serious and major prayer upheaval in the area of birth control vs. no b.c. and we'd love to hear all about your different experiences. We definitely believe that children are a blessing from the Lord and we for sure believe that having a "quiverfull" is a good thing. On the other hand, we are more and more broke and I'm totally flipped out in desperate prayer about where we are going to get the money to circumsize this little guy (can you BELIEVE it costs up to 400 bucks??? I mean, shoot, we could just do it!) and everything in the world (mostly our parents and concerned friends and family) are like... ok, two is enough. Stop now. We're pretty conflicted, because that's definitely not what the Bible says. We'd love to have a clan of ten kids, but I mean, I don't even drive and we don't own a car. How in the heck would we do it? And if I thought I was sleepy now---- haha.
yeah, haven't slept in three days straight, because Annika has been up all night coughing and wheezing. this is week six of her being sick. boo. SO probably this blog will come out sounding as delirious as I am. I'm now going to sink into the couch and do some knitting--- I cast on for Knit1's raglan boatneck sweater yesterday... woah! I'm on a roll.... and I may only have two more weeks of knitting, reading, and everything else before the world is upheaved again. Ah!
"Perhaps this is one of the secrets of life-- to know 'Glory' when we see it..." --Charlotte M. Mason
I'm going to share a little story with you, since you seem like someone who would appreciate it. Ultimately, we believe, who lives and who dies is in God's hands. You could have unprotected sex for years and never get pregnant, you could have sex, one time, with triple-layered birth control, and still conceive. You can drop dead sitting on your sofa at home, or you could shoot yourself in the head, and - if God wills it - you will live. The reason that murder and fornication are two of the most grievous sins is that they trifle with God's powers of life and death, that He has given us a portion of.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, when we got married, my husband and I had a long conversation with God and basically said that whenever he chose to bestow a child on us we would accept them gladly. Our first son was born a year and a half later, in such a perfect culmination of circumstances (including things we had no way of foreseeing when he was conceived) that we admitted with awe the hand of God in the timing.
After that we were faced with a dilemma. Should we keep having sex without contraceptive measures? Or should we try to plan our next baby? We thought about it, and reasoned with each other, and prayed, and we came to the conclusion that we would plan our second child. We think that we have an obligation to use our procreative powers responsibly, taking an active role in them instead of assuming no responsibility or thought for them. We chose to use condoms, as a sort of method with a fairly high failure risk, and said, "Father, we think that we should wait to have another child, and this is what we're doing about it. If we're wrong, please send us a baby and we will love and welcome it, but we're making the best decision we know how."
When we felt we could handle another pregnancy, we stopped using them. A few months later we conceived and now have our second son, two years after his brother. We plan to have several more children (hopefully a few girls!) but right now we are waiting again - a little longer this time, due to some outside circumstances.
Money has been tight in many of the best large families that I know. Only you know if you can or cannot support another child - and if you can't I personally think it would be responsible to wait a little while. Ultimately it's between you, your husband, and God, and shouldn't be anyone else's business. (You know. Unless your kids are starving to death.)
Congratulations and good luck on your upcoming delivery!
I hope your newest arrival comes safely!
ReplyDeletePersonally I think if you feel money is tight and you may not be able to handle more children at the moment, it's definitely not a bad thing to wait a while before having another. You can always take a bit of time off to save up some money and get in a more secure situation, then try again.
There are lots of birth control options available, if you choose to use one do some research and choose the one or ones that suit you best. The Planned Parenthood website has a lot of good information about the different methods available, how to use them, how they work, and the advantages/disadvantages. http://www.plannedparenthood.org/birth-control-pregnancy/birth-control.htm
Just wanted to encourage you, God provides for the children He sends. If God's calling you to trust Him in an area, He will provide what's needed. Blessings on you and your new baby.
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