Wednesday, October 20, 2010

"The Vatican" says...On Simpsons and Stonecutters.

All day yesterday I was asked my opinion on this news story, published in Forbes Magazine, which was headed: "The Vatican line: Homer Simpson is a Catholic."

Some just wanted to know what I thought, while others wanted to know why the Vatican does things like "approve" the Simpsons. Over the course of the day, my ideas about it changed, and I thought it might be interesting to describe why.

I grew up banned from watching the Simpsons. While most of my friends were quoting the show and wearing Simpsons paraphernalia, I didn't know much about it and was completely alienated from Simpsons culture. Therefore, I don't feel that I am qualified to hold an actual opinion about the show-- I haven't studied it to see what my sense of it's morals and messages actually ARE.

My impressions, however, are very negative. Thinking about the Simpsons brings up memories of some skater punk kid with a vast range of stupid expressions getting himself into scrapes and situations while his dead beat dad drinks and avoids work, and his materialistic mom tries to hold the family together. I associate them with weird images: the dad with beer, the baby with a pacifier and alone, the mom with big hair, the sister with a telephone in her room, and the son, whose name is an anagram of the word BRAT, with a skateboard, alone in the streets. Not ideal. When I see them "as a family" I see them propped up in front of the TV together.

As the story first surfaced, I found it hard to imagine why in the world the Vatican would want to present the Simpsons in a positive light (this was now the second article in the year that made the rounds about how "Catholic" the Simpsons allegedly are.) It bothered me in the same way the Vatican's pardoning of the Beatles bothered me.... Taking something that seems so obviously Satanic and worldly and trying to lift it up as "approved" and "acceptable" to the Holy Catholic Church-- and for what? To make the Church seem "modern" and "relevant." Yuck.

As a former protestant, I can say that one of the greatest appeals of the Catholic Church is that there is no need to "modernize" or "make relevant" to people what is already the most relevant thing on earth: The Gospel. On merit alone, the Catholic Church can stand as an eternal institution, accessible to all. Catholics celebrate the brilliance of God's creation by acknowledging something that others find hard to fathom-- that as Christians, we need not be AFRAID of science, of culture, of art or music, but rather that Christ is Lord of these things also. The marriage of Catholicism and scientific study, philosophy, or other areas of intellectual and artistic involvement is a God- honoring, beautiful thing. I don't have to be stupid, ignorant or uneducated because I'm a Christian! What a relief. :P

Call me strange, but I just don't think that a Church with a 2000+ year history, with the tangible presence of and approval of Jesus Christ, needs to do anything at all. And that is the Catholic answer-- YES, of course, we are called to evangelize the culture, but that doesn't mean appropriating for ourselves the things which are CLEARLY "of the world." Rather, by our confidence in the Church, we share her relevance to society. By our ability to say to people: "It's BETTER if you're a Catholic, but you don't HAVE to be," we share our good sense and rational thinking, as well as the great mercy of our glorious God.

So, no, I don't think we need to look around and find ways to demonstrate how Catholic McDonalds, Dora the Explorer, or Facebook is. I think the Church's merit in our culture rests on itself. That's point A.

Point B is even more interesting. Contrary to popular belief, NO, the Vatican did not declare yesterday that the Simpsons were awesome. According to the article,
the paper quoted from an analysis by a Jesuit priest, the Rev. Francesco Occhetta,

Oh! So a Jesuit priest says it, the Osservatoro reports it, and Forbes magazine shares it.... and suddenly "The Vatican says...." No.
That's not how it works-- and even if the pope were to wake up tomorrow morning and say "I love the Simpsons," that STILL wouldn't mean that "The Vatican" said the Simpsons were good watching. That's what I love about purposeful media action and general public stupidity. It's a real thing, and stuff like this sets the stage for bigger brainwashing, like: "The Pope is a pedophile," or "The Catholic Church hates women." Essentially, the public -- and even the CATHOLIC public-- has no understanding of how, exactly, the Magesterium governs, and this lack of knowledge paves the way for MINDLESS ROBOTS in the Catholic world (we've all seen them; they are the ones going "My priest said it was OK....") and also for Satanic hounding of the Catholic Church by uninformed liberals and progressives.

So basically, a priest (a JESUIT priest, no less) and a newspaper (and a bit of money) just convinced countless Americans that they should watch the Simpsons. Wow.

Which brings me to point C. C for conspiracy, cause YEAH, I'm going there.
We all know I've been hounding everyone for months now about all the subliminal messages in TV, movies and music. The Simpsons is no different, you can find references to masonic culture, secret hand signals, 9-11 and other creepy masonic and illuminati plots throughout, and anyone with a few hours to kill and a subscription to youTube can see what I mean. (You can start here, if you like)

However, I can say with absolute certainty that having examined this question for months now, you will not be able to escape Masonic and Illuminati references, nor will you escape subliminal programming, if you WATCH TV. Period. It is in TV and music everywhere, and quite honestly, short of pulling the plug on video and audio, you can be sure that some of it will filter in, which is why it's important to ask God to allow His peace to guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.(Philippians 4:7) When I first discovered all of this programming built into our "TELEVISION PROGRAMMING" (hello???) I was so horrified I think I went a little bit nuts trying to warn everyone and keep my family safe. Who wouldn't? It's literally EVERY WHERE.

A little bit of research brings us then to Matt Groening, the Simpsons' creator, who was a Freemason, according to Masonic watchdog organizations. Surprise! Groening first became known for his Comic Strip (pay attention to the name) Life in Hell, which was based on the chapter "How to Go to Hell" in Walter Kaufmann's book Critique of Religion and Philosophy. Even if the Masonic part were NOT true, Groening identifies himself publicly as an agnostic and a liberal and has often made campaign contributions to Democratic Party candidates.

So now what we are left with is this: a Masonic plot by Big Money (Forbes), the Media (Osservatore) and corrupt clergy (Jesuits) to convince the American People that a show which has very little moral value but which they all relate to (Simpsons) is a beneficial, wholesome thing. When Americans TUNE IN, they will find countless programming opportunities to accept freemasonry all the while believing that what they are seeing is "Catholic."

How's that for a scheme?

But just to be clear, I'm not at all saying: Don't watch the Simpsons... I've never really seen the show. What I AM saying is be aware. "THE Vatican" didn't tell you that the Simpsons were good, or wholesome, or fine. Deception is so deceptive!

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