First steps, death, and sharing in the heritage of the saints.

I think I'm going to share with you guys some of the rich heritage in Christ you share with people you might not have ever heard of. I'm doing this because on this journey it seems God is leading me to rethink decisions I've made on a whole different level. When you are confirmed as a Catholic, you chose a saint who has, in some way, drawn you closer to Jesus. At the time, I chose St Barbara, not only because of my name but because she was a strong example of faith on fire--- she was martyred in her "glory days," by her father, no less, and remained strong in the faith even at the end. Reflecting on her life I'm often amazed at how FAR God asks us to go for Him. She also just "happened" to be everywhere I went-- I even ended up living in Santa Barbara. :)

I don't have to go through any special process to return to the Church, because, as a wise priest said to me, "You've been Catholic all along." But I wanted to be under the umbrella of an additional saint's patronage as I make this next step, and so I prayerfully chose St. Monica, who's story I'm going to share with you here. Her example as a wife and mother should hopefully encourage you all.... especially the numerous nonCatholics who read my blog, and I know I immediately connect with her on many, many levels.

August 27
St. Monica
(322?-387)

The circumstances of St. Monica’s life could have made her a nagging wife, a bitter daughter-in-law and a despairing parent, yet she did not give way to any of these temptations. Although she was a Christian, her parents gave her in marriage to a pagan, Patricius, who lived in her hometown of Tagaste in North Africa. Patricius had some redeeming features, but he had a violent temper and was licentious. Monica also had to bear with a cantankerous mother-in-law who lived in her home. Patricius criticized his wife because of her charity and piety, but always respected her. Monica’s prayers and example finally won her husband and mother-in-law to Christianity. Her husband died in 371, one year after his Baptism.

Monica had at least three children who survived infancy. The oldest, Augustine, is the most famous. At the time of his father’s death, Augustine was 17 and a rhetoric student in Carthage. Monica was distressed to learn that her son had accepted the Manichean heresy and was living an immoral life. For a while, she refused to let him eat or sleep in her house. Then one night she had a vision that assured her Augustine would return to the faith. From that time on she stayed close to her son, praying and fasting for him. In fact, she often stayed much closer than Augustine wanted.

When he was 29, Augustine decided to go to Rome to teach rhetoric. Monica was determined to go along. One night he told his mother that he was going to the dock to say goodbye to a friend. Instead, he set sail for Rome. Monica was heartbroken when she learned of Augustine’s trick, but she still followed him. She arrived in Rome only to find that he had left for Milan. Although travel was difficult, Monica pursued him to Milan.

In Milan Augustine came under the influence of the bishop, St. Ambrose, who also became Monica’s spiritual director. She accepted his advice in everything and had the humility to give up some practices that had become second nature to her (see Quote, below). Monica became a leader of the devout women in Milan as she had been in Tagaste.

She continued her prayers for Augustine during his years of instruction. At Easter, 387, St. Ambrose baptized Augustine and several of his friends. Soon after, his party left for Africa. Although no one else was aware of it, Monica knew her life was near the end. She told Augustine, “Son, nothing in this world now affords me delight. I do not know what there is now left for me to do or why I am still here, all my hopes in this world being now fulfilled.” She became ill shortly after and suffered severely for nine days before her death.

Almost all we know about St. Monica is in the writings of St. Augustine, especially his Confessions.

Comment:

Today, with Internet searches, e-mail shopping and instant credit, we have little patience for things that take time. Likewise, we want instant answers to our prayers. Monica is a model of patience. Her long years of prayer, coupled with a strong, well-disciplined character, finally led to the conversion of her hot-tempered husband, her cantankerous mother-in-law and her brilliant but wayward son, Augustine.

Quote:

When Monica moved from North Africa to Milan, she found religious practices new to her and also that some of her former customs, such as a Saturday fast, were not common there. She asked St. Ambrose which customs she should follow. His classic reply was: “When I am here, I do not fast on Saturday, but I fast when I am in Rome; do the same and always follow the custom and discipline of the Church as it is observed in the particular locality in which you find yourself.”


(This entry appears in the print edition of Saint of the Day.)

Hopefully you guys will gain as much as I have already from reflecting on the life of such an amazing example of the faith. :)

Yesterday, I had an amazing talk with my dad. If you've read this blog any number of years, you know that he and I rarely have talks I would deem "amazing." But I was really blessed and encouraged by this one. It mostly revolved around death, strangely, because a large number of my family members are currently in the process of passing away through various illnesses.
Death (and interestingly, public speaking) are the greatest fears of almost the entire population of the world. Which is strange, because for believers, death is about new life. Over the years, I have had far more than my fair share of death of friends and family. Part of it was the circles I ran in, of course, but it was hard nonetheless.

I remember the first one, when I was thirteen, Jennifer Baer, a girl I knew from school who wrapped her car around a tree. A few months later came Aepryhll's brother who was eaten by a shark, and then shortly thereafter a slew of 30-plus friends who died in everything from drunk driving accidents, to various types of overdoses, to gun accidents. One died while demonstrating a pyrotechnic device he had created for a play. It shot out and punched a hole right through his heart upstairs in his parents house. Another died because a rat cage at his work in a petstore carried a disease that he caught when he scraped his hand on the cage. Another died of lymphoma, and still another of a gunshot wound. Family members died of old age. Two soldier friends were KIA.
Not to mention the seven friends I have who TOOK their lives in one way or another.... purposeful overdoses, hangings, wrist slittings and shootings.
Three of them did it, and then when they realized they were really going to die, tried to get help but where unsuccessful. They were found in various positions of agony, trying to reach doors or telephones.

My dad and I talked about how, every year since I can remember, someone I am relatively close to dies. My husband has known only one death, his two year old cousin who died of lymphoma. He can't fathom the amount of death I've dealt with-- and I can't fathom the amount of death poeple like my brother have seen in his years as a paratrooper.. or the sheer difficulty of it. Death is rough, no matter how we look at it.

My dad, like a lot of people, have a very hard time with death. I'm not one of them.... although I mourn, I try to always remember that every moment could be our last. That's why I never let wayne go out the door without telling him I love him very much, or why I never let someone leave the house without a big hug and a prayer :)

It's important for us to fix our eyes on death, because it is a reality we NEED to come to terms with... and in my experience it has been a huge opening for the gospel-- people listen when they are afraid. Maybe that wasn't just for my dad, so I'm sharing it with you guys today-- every day may really be your last! Make them count, and let God use you to bring LIFE to people!

Amidst all the death talk, we got to talk about new life too. Wayne and I are talkign about getting the kids baptized. We both used to be adamantly against it, but now feel as if scripture is relatively silent on the subject. Whole households were indeed baptized, and the purpose is and remains a public expression of a decision for Christ, alongside an "entrance" into the Christian community. As their parents, the act of baptizing them is telling the devil that he isn't going to get them, and making a promise to commit to teaching them the ways of God.
And there certainly is nothing that prevents a child from being baptized in scripture.
For that reason, and especially because in our experience, Children who are baptized often experience the call of God on their lives early and always powerfully, we feel ready to baptize them. We are going to talk about it with their Godparents. Which means that God is breathing new life into this family even now when we are surrounded by death, destruction and fear-- and that's a beautiful thing.